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SelfHarming Offline
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Is this abuse? - July 13th 2016, 12:26 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

My cousin/best friend is going through depression currently

I'm always trying to help by asking her if she's OK and stuff like that but every time I say something to her she bites me and slams me up against the wall and yells at me

I really don't understand what I did wrong because one time she told me to ask her how she was doing everyday just so I wouldn't have to be worried

Now she isn't talking to me

She's going to a different school next year

I read her diary and read that she was going suicidal she's already attempted

I began cutting already

I'm only 13 I shouldn't have to go through this

Plz help
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Celyn Offline
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Re: Is this abuse? - July 13th 2016, 04:23 PM

Hey there,

I'm sorry to hear that your cousin feels depressed. Regardless of how she may be feeling, she has no right to bite you, slam you up against a wall and yell at you. That is abusive of her.

I'm sorry to hear that she isn't talking to you. It must be confusing for you, as you clearly care about her and want to help. It was very caring of you to regularly ask her how she is. At the same time, it sounds like it must be hard for your cousin too- changing schools, feeling suicidal etc. Do you know if she sees a counsellor or therapist? If she does, perhaps you can let her know that you are worried about her and want her to talk to a counsellor about how she is feeling. Also, it's probably a good idea to tell an adult about this situation regarding your cousin...perhaps your parents, or another family member?

It's understandable that you would feel worried and stressed by what's going on with your cousin. You are young and you shouldn't have to go through this alone. Have you told anyone about how you have been feeling? While it's good that you look out for your cousin, your feelings matter too. I think it might also benefit you if you could talk to someone, especially about your cutting. I don't know if you've seen it, but we have an alternatives to self harm thread here that you might like to check out. It's best to try to find distractions when you feel like cutting, so that that the urges can go away without you hurting yourself.

Take care

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crystalpanda Offline
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Re: Is this abuse? - July 13th 2016, 10:32 PM

hey there, yes that is abusive, has she spoken to any adults about it ?? if you feel she is going to try to take her life tell an adult you trust
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