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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
TheBabyEater Offline
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My case... - May 23rd 2009, 01:58 PM

I'm starting to get sick of my familly and stuff... So after almost running away illegaly, then almost killing myself all in about 2 hours, my boyfriend sudgested I do file this... thing where I cant remember the name. -.-
It's basically where if you have good grades, a place to go, and a job, you can go to court and basically disown your familly if youre a minor. I have all those except a job, and I'll just find one there if/when the time comes.

But... I dont know if my familly is really that bad that I'd be aloud to do this. For the longest time I've though it was normal.
In short, for those lazy like me who dont wanna read all this, they seem to get mad for little things, hit me in a joking way, call me stupid sometimes and hate my not normalness. Yet they don't 'abuse' me...

So.. to try and explain it..um. To start, they are very insensitive and ignorant. They plan things or cancel things for ME then dont tell me and expect me to know somehow... for instance, I had planned to see my boyfriend this weekend but for some reason my dad decided he didn't want to take me with him to the baseball game in St. Louis. Decided this 2 days ago, and didn't tell me. And practically yelled at me for not knowing it.
I know that alone is certainly not enough reason to leave. It's probably actually pretty normal. But it's annoying as hell, and is basically what set me off last night.

Then they do stuff like this... A week or so ago we were off to dinner in my fairly new used car. My dad was getting pretty pissed about how when we test drived it, it had a different and better steering wheel. He wanted to go back and argue about it, but I said no for a few reasons. 1 being I honestly didn't care and 2 being I've seen them like that and it's just rude, not productive. So upon hearing this, they said in short, 'you know nothing about cars, and nothing about how the world works' Basically calling me stupid. They do this kind of stuff often. Then later that evening I was getting in my car and hit my knee really hard. First my dad yelled at me for ruining my leather by stepping on it (for half a second) then when I confronted him about yelling at me for how I treat my car when I'm in pain he said "Well maybe if you'd get in the car like a NORMAL person you wouldnt get hurt"
My parents hate how I'm not 'normal'

Then theres this which is just confusing... My dad and brother, (and often other uncles in my familly) tend to..hit me. Everyone finds it fun to grab my neck knowing I hate it and am positively scared of it. This would be good to say in court, except.. It's all just joking around. I'm not sure they MEAN to hurt me, leave a bruise here and there, or hurt my 'feelings'... I just joke around with them cause I refuse to show weakness and that it bothers the hell outta me.

So... I dont know. Cause my parents arn't all THAT bad.. They provide for me, give me things, and stuff. I recently got a sweet car and I know it. They let me have things like a cell phone, mp3 player, pets, and so many guitars... I'm very fortunate with them. It's not like they come home and drunkenly beat me. (though my boyfriend will say that they did, my dad went to a bar and yelled at me for being a bit late coming home. So I probably exaggerated it)


As I said earlier, in short, they seem to get mad for little things, hit me in a joking way, call me stupid sometimes and hate my not normalness. Yet they don't 'abuse' me... They provide for me, and I know in ways I'm lucky to have what I have. Yet I cant stand staying with them... Still think about leaving illegaly.



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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: My case... - May 23rd 2009, 06:28 PM

have you ever talked to them? Told your family, or told someone to tell your family, that what they do hurts you? If you maybe explained your feelings and such to them, they would stop, and if they didn't, then it would be a much more pressing problem (not saying that this isn't pressing, but I'm not sure that you should take them to court just yet...)
   
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Re: My case... - May 23rd 2009, 07:25 PM

Marissa,

I'm pretty sure your boyfriend was talking about emancipation. You're automatically emancipated when you become a legal adult and reach the age of majority. However, if need be, you can file for emancipation. If you can convince a judge you can support yourself financially and have a place to live, and that you're both mature and responsible enough to handle living on your own, you can be emancipated before you become an adult.

There are different kinds of abuse, Marissa, not just physical abuse. Your parents may not physically abuse you but it sounds to me they're emotionally/verbally abusive, which is just as bad. They may support you financially, but that doesn't give them the right to yell at you for things out of your control or to physically hurt you when you have told them no in the past. That's not right at all, and it's not fair to you to have to be in this kind of environment.

The problem with leaving illegally is that you'll end up being caught and brought back sooner or later, running away rarely works. Sooner or later someone will find you and make you go home, whether it's a family member or the police. Something to think about though, before you file for emancipation - is there anyone else you could move in with, any other family members? Could you try living with someone else for a while before you file for emancipation? Legally you can move out on your own around age sixteen [the age depends on where you live but it's generally around sixteen you can live on your own], so think about that as well.

If you decide to file for emancipation, make sure to find a good attorney because it's always worth your money to find someone who's good at what they do, rather than a kid fresh out of law school. Let me know if you have any questions about emancipation or want to talk about anything, ok? I'm here anytime. Keep yourself safe and take care.



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TheBabyEater Offline
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Re: My case... - May 24th 2009, 12:18 AM

No... As I said I refuse to show weakness to them.. It's my biggest problem. I mean, I'll show that I'm pissed off at them. But that only makes them angry, and we get into a fight. They don't say like 'sorry for blahblahblah' ever.

I've continued to talk to my boyfriend about it. I have a place to go, and I consider myself pretty mature... Pretty good grades and in the National Honors Society.. I could try and find a job, I plan this summer either way. Problem is, he said I would need some kind of evidence or else it's just my word against theirs. And even if you do like a lie detector test, I dont think it's work because my parents and I could both tell the truth and still have opposite stories. I don't have 'evidence'
They rarely leave bruises or anything.



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