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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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~Radio Flyer~ Offline
Please call that story back.

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Part 2 about guys approaching me - May 2nd 2017, 09:01 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of rape or abuse, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Somrthing happened again. This time it was really intense and I felt trapped

I erased the rest. I don't know. This what I get for being a bad person.

Last edited by ~Radio Flyer~; May 3rd 2017 at 01:21 AM.
   
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Re: Part 2 about guys approaching me - May 3rd 2017, 03:01 PM

You're not a bad person. <3

I know talking about these things can be very difficult, but talking about them can help. Talking about what you experienced can help you get things out of your head and you won't have to hold it all on your own anymore. Don't hesitate to come back to this thread and post if you feel safe enough to do so. If not, I'm sure many people (myself included) would happily talk to you through PMs.


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Re: Part 2 about guys approaching me - May 3rd 2017, 04:55 PM

I actually saw the original post, I just hadn't been able to finish writing my reply. but that guy is the disgusting person. that guy is the bad person. you did nothing wrong at all.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I think you are very brave and smart however, to think so far ahead to take the precautions you did and get out of that situation. of course I won't give specific examples about what I'm talking about, as I'm respectful of your privacy with erasing the post.
I just really want you to know you truly didn't deserve any of that, and if you need to talk please PM me.


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Celyn Offline
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Re: Part 2 about guys approaching me - May 3rd 2017, 06:17 PM

I'm really sorry I hadn't seen your post sooner. I don't know what happened, but you are not a bad person and didn't deserve what happened either.

As everyone else has said, it can help to talk about what happened and your feelings. It's okay if you don't feel ready to open up yet, but remember that we are always here for you.


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Re: Part 2 about guys approaching me - May 3rd 2017, 08:37 PM

I haven't seen but I can say with certainly you are not a bad person
   
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Re: Part 2 about guys approaching me - May 4th 2017, 08:53 PM

I didn't see what you'd originally written, but I wanted to let you know that you are far from being a bad person. I don't know what happened to you, but there are some pretty messed up people in the world that like the prey on the vulnerable or someone who they think is less than them. Whatever happened, you did not deserve it.
   
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Re: Part 2 about guys approaching me - May 13th 2017, 11:37 PM

Thank youu all of you so much.

So I havent seen my therapist since that Tuesday morning before the incident becsuse she was going to be away for Teo weeks. The next time I will see her will be this coming Tuesday. I told her very briefly what had happened through text. She said we could report it together when she comes back but I told her I already reported it to the center.
Which brings me back to that. I haven't been to the center since the incident. That say I called up the center thoigh and at the time it was too fresh to give details bug I had said "he followed me and it progressed"
When asked for more detail I just said "I don't know" and "I can't say" "I just want him to never come near me"
But looking back it ws silly to make that request as the staff I spoke to never met me and didn't know who the guy was. I told him my name and I told him the guy's name as the guy did introduce himself. However the staff could not find the guy's name in the database. He said he thinks he knows who the guy is though. It makes me wonder if the guy had been given a warning before....
At any rate I told the staff which unit I belong to and he contacted my unit leader. My unit leader called me and he either didnt know i was shaken up or he didn't care/think it was serious becsuse he casually asked me if I was okay.I told him yes even though I wasnt. Then he asked me if he will see me tomorrow. I told him I don't know.
He tried to reassure me that "these things are rare here"
Seems like he is more concerned about the reputation. I was looking out for how he was handling if and responding to it. That's what the staff CAN control. Whereas they cannot control other people's behaviors. I still don't feel safe to go back. And I am scared of being judged for taking too long to recover ehen I do return because my unit leader would know why I stopped going there and he indirectly put it out there that I should brush it off as a rare incident and move on, rejoin the group etc. So if I dont, I am not meeting the expectation and is making me hold back even longer

Also he said he would talk to the guy. Still confused how talking would make a difference. It would probably just give my identity away of who reported him.

I did speak to RAINN a few days ago and they referred me to an organization that has a support group for sexual assault survivors. It would be for past incidents too not just this one (because I barely know how to categorize it, is it verbal and physical but also sexual? Etc)

Also I told the psychiatrist that I hadn't been sexually abused but I'm thinking of clarifying that there were several incidents that involved a certain kind of aggression that I think is sexual. But these were majority strangers except for 1 who was an acquaintance and none of them were my boyfriend of a family member but I'm still affected by it and I just want to be taken seriously.
   
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Re: Part 2 about guys approaching me - May 14th 2017, 04:35 AM

Regardless of whether they're strangers or not, that shouldn't matter... it happened to you. It effected you. It is a crime against you and any report of that manner should be taken seriously, no matter who did it.

I'm glad you're working to get help so soon, that's a good sign and that's the best thing you can do for yourself. I'm also so glad you reported it asap as well, and I commend you for being brave enough to do that. I would suggest you possibly take this to the police as well? From what I read, you've reported it to the center so far, but not the police, correct? Since the center isn't helping you much, I think you might get further with the investigation if you go to the police. Just a thought.
Sorry for how the people are treating it, it's definitely not just some "rare incident you need to move on from". This happened, whether it puts their reputation at risk or not, and you deserve justice from it.

Best of luck to you, keep us updated if you feel comfortable doing so.


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Re: Part 2 about guys approaching me - May 15th 2017, 09:33 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Poison.ivy View Post
Regardless of whether they're strangers or not, that shouldn't matter... it happened to you. It effected you. It is a crime against you and any report of that manner should be taken seriously, no matter who did it.

I'm glad you're working to get help so soon, that's a good sign and that's the best thing you can do for yourself. I'm also so glad you reported it asap as well, and I commend you for being brave enough to do that. I would suggest you possibly take this to the police as well? From what I read, you've reported it to the center so far, but not the police, correct? Since the center isn't helping you much, I think you might get further with the investigation if you go to the police. Just a thought.
Sorry for how the people are treating it, it's definitely not just some "rare incident you need to move on from". This happened, whether it puts their reputation at risk or not, and you deserve justice from it.

Best of luck to you, keep us updated if you feel comfortable doing so.
I made a phone call to the reference I hot from RAINN. It turns out the support group is only for adult survivors of child sexual abuse.
I told them I'd be interested in this because of my past history (some of the incidents involved were when I was underage)
I got passed around with contact numbers and made phone calls till I got to a voice mail and just left a message. So I guess that's all I can do for now.

At any rate,
I also been looking into women shelters so j can escape mg home life. Howrver, this is probably more of a cry for help and a way to distract myself from killing myself. Beca use it is one thing to deal with home life being dysfunctional but that with trying to cope with the incident and all the other traumatic things that happened in the past month alone is absolute hell.

I'm not even asking for my dad to be there for me. I know hd is too concerned with more important matters. The whole reason I tried escaping to a community center was because I feel unsafe at home. I feel like I'm being haunted and there will never be a safe place for me.
I'm not a child anymore and my situation isn't fitting the definition of domestic violence becsuse most organizations decided that means intimate partner violence. There was that before my mom died but my dad has been widowed for many years so I feel like there's no place for adult children of broken homes besides mental illness related. There's no actual refuge though.
I will see my therapist tomorrow after her two week break, so it will be the firdt time seeing her since the incident and I will mention the police but idk. Don't think thry can do much.
   
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Re: Part 2 about guys approaching me - May 17th 2017, 08:09 AM

I haven't seen the original post. But i don't think you're a bad person.
   
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Re: Part 2 about guys approaching me - May 22nd 2017, 03:12 AM

Remember, you are reacting normally to an abnormal situation. It is OKAY to be scared, it is OKAY to be anxious. React how you need to sweetie. It will get better x
   
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