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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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Kokoro Offline
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Too Late. - October 5th 2009, 10:40 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of rape or abuse, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

April 2008 is all I can think about. I hardly knew him. He gave me alcohol. He gave me weed. Me and my friend. But why me? Rather me than her but why?

I know it's a long time ago. I should be over it by now but the flashbacks I keep having, only recently are just too much. It's unbearable. He doesn't live here anymore. It's too late. I don't even know his surname. He is Barry. But that's all I know. I can't tell the cops I have no proof, no evidence. He could be out there, touching another young girl, raping someone. All I did was let him out to get someone else. It's just too late. I have no idea what to do. I really don't. I just wish somehow I could find out who he was. Now looking at a man with a bald head is scary, sometimes I am finding myself crying over it, I started crying in science today. It made me so suicidal when it happened. I was scared. Terrified.

I have to do something but I just don't know what.. nobody knows.
My closest friends know. I wouldn't dare tell my mum or my dad. Nobody I can tell who'll make a difference. I just want to do something so bad.
But I know if I ever had to see him again it'd kill me. When I picture his face I feel like crying.

Sorry to rant on you like this everyone. I just need some advice on what to do. Thanks for reading xxxx


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Re: Too Late. - October 5th 2009, 11:41 PM

Do you feel like you need to have him charged before you can feel better?
   
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Re: Too Late. - October 6th 2009, 12:50 AM

Hey there hun. I want to start off by telling you that what happened was not your fault and I hope you aren't blaming yourself. The man that hurt you is the only one to blame. And it doesn't matter how long ago it happened. Abuse can affect us for a very long time and everyone heals at their own pace. My abuse happened many years ago and it still hurts sometimes. Don't rush yourself through healing.

I know you said you have talked to some friends, but what about talking with a counselor? They have to keep things completely confidential and they can really help you work through what's happened. It's nice to have someone to talk to while you're working through abuse and the feelings associated with it.

And I know you said you couldn't talk to your parents, but I think they would want to know and would want to be there for you through this hun. Parents can surprise us sometimes and you deserve support and love right now.

As for not reporting what happened, it's okay hun. You did what you had to to get through it all. You cannot take responsibility for any actions he may take in the future. His choices are not your fault.

I hope you're doing okay right now and please PM me if you ever need to talk.
<3 emily


"Sometimes it's a struggle to be not who you want to be, not who you used to be, not who you're going to be,
but just being right where you are, who you are"

   
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Re: Too Late. - October 6th 2009, 04:13 PM

Hey thanks for your replies guys.

I TOLD SOMEONE. I TOLD MY HEAD OF YEAR. but.. she told my dad.

I am so mad she said she wouldn't tell him, she said I could trust her. I am so mad at her my dad wants me to get the police involved but I can't, i can't talk about it YET AGAIN!!

I am so upset, I am pouring she has just made my day 300x worse.

What should I do now?


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