TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
hammer2fall Offline
Just chillin'...
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
hammer2fall's Avatar
 
Name: Adam
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Location: Canada

Posts: 21
Join Date: February 4th 2009

Question What to say? - October 28th 2009, 02:52 AM

My girlfriend has been physically and verbally abused by her father, and recently felt comfortable telling me about it. I'm fine listening to her, and we both understand that I don't have the answers for her. The problem is, when she rants to me, I don't know what to say. So when she tells me, I just say "ok" or "thats horrible", but that's not enough.
So what I'm asking is - what do you say when someone is telling you about their abuse?


I saw these counters in some other sigs, so I decided to give one a try... this is the only special event I could think of...


   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Yen Offline
Resident Leprechaun
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
Yen's Avatar
 
Name: Ian
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Location: Oregon

Posts: 352
Join Date: October 21st 2009

Re: What to say? - October 28th 2009, 03:39 AM

I was in a similar situation with a girl I dated a while back. She had been abused all through her childhood. I suppose it's different for every one, but we both found that what helped her most and made her comfortable to talk about it any time she needed to was just me lending a sympathetic ear. What she really wanted weren't any words from me, just some one she could safely let it out to and I was happy to be that person . It may be similar with your girlfriend. Comfort her and just ask her if there's anything that you can do to make things better or easier for her. She'll appreciate the concern and willingness to help.
I hope this helps a little .


"Why isn't bull-riding (Beef NASCAR as I call it) the American sport to end all sports? It's an epic battle of the wills between a man and an angry cheeseburger; and if that doesn't typify our awesome civilization, I don't know what does."
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Pug girl!
Junior TeenHelper
****
 
Honorary Pug Girl's Avatar
 
Name: Bre :3
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Location: lost in the music

Posts: 300
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: January 30th 2009

Re: What to say? - October 28th 2009, 10:49 AM

As the person above said its different for each person, some like to be comforted while others just want advice. I guess you just be there for her and maybe suggest she talk to someone like a counselor. I know that can be scary but they can help her a lot. When my dad used to verbally abuse me I just wanted someone to talk to but was scared cause I didn't know who I could trust, but then I opened up and it helped a lot. Also when my brother hit me I didn't tell anyone except my best friend but what I needed was just someone to talk to. So I guess my best advice is be there and help her through this.


LIVE HELP ASSOCIATE
08/07/14 Social Networking Team

She walks away the colors fade to grey. - Black Keys

Keep your head up, you're only one grey day away from sunshine.

10/15/2015- The day he came into my life and made it all okay.
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Scarlatti Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
Scarlatti's Avatar
 
Name: Sophie
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Location: Yoonighted States

Posts: 29
Join Date: January 21st 2009

Re: What to say? - November 2nd 2009, 05:49 PM

Words are not needed from the comforter. When we feel comfortable enough to share our pain with someone we trust, all we need is that trusted love to hold us and protect us in their embrace.

Let her bury her face in your chest and she'll be the happiest and most comforted soul you'll ever see.


Embrace your dorkdome.

"When you're in love you can't sleep, because reality is so much better than dreams."

  Send a message via MSN to Scarlatti  
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
chook14 Offline
♪ itchin' on a photograph ♫
Junior TeenHelper
****
 
chook14's Avatar
 
Name: Ella
Gender: Female
Location: Australia

Posts: 208
Join Date: August 15th 2009

Re: What to say? - November 3rd 2009, 11:48 AM

I know that if I was to talk to someone about the abuse i've endured, I'd just want them to listen. They wouldn't have to say anything at all. Just the knowledge that they were on my side would be enough. Maybe just let her know that? That you are 100% on her side. It'll make her feel much stronger
   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.