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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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Mason Offline
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WTF - November 29th 2009, 11:53 PM

My girls ma called me today. Said Nikki agreed to talk to me about what happened to her. She didn't want a stranger so I told her to send her over to my house didnt want her ma to see my busted up face. My girl came over bout hr later. Says she wants to smoke, calm down alil before she tells me. After we smoke she tells me everything. I wanted to scream at her to shut the fuck up cuz it was killing me to hear it. I wanted to freak out and cover my ears but I knew she needed to tell someone so I listen. I didnt know what to say after expect I love her and would do anything she needed to make things better for her. She asked me to have sex with her, said she didnt wanna feel them in her anymore. She asked me not to use a condom, wanted to feel me, I know she got tested at the hospital and she is on bc, but I get nervous about that shit but just wanted to make her happy. We started fooling around but it was hard not to think about what she just told me but she kept saying please just do this for me so we started having sex and she starts crying. I stop and says please again like dont stop and i was like girl your crying ya know. And she beggs me to keep going so I did and she said harder. So I did and bout 2 mins later she starts crying even harder and starts punching me in the side and in my back and acting like I was restraining her or something. Idk but freaked me out so I stop right away and she starts saying again don't stop but she is still trying to fight me and it's just werid as fuck so I dont know what to do at this point. She is saying not to stop but is acting like Im raping her which was upsetting to me ya know. So I try again but she is sobbing and punching me but also saying I love you but then was saying no...so I'd stop and she would tell me not to stop and I was just like whaaaat the fuck. I stop and told her I couldn't do it anymore and she said just hold me so we cuddled. We fell asleep together but when I just woke up she wasnt here...I txted her phone and she said just leave me alone tonight. please.

Idk...fucked up. I just dont know what to do from here...
   
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Re: WTF - November 30th 2009, 02:04 AM

Mason,
All I can say is, if this is very recent for her (I haven't read any of your prior posts) she may think that this is what will make it all better, an instant fix... but she is probably reliving it while you were having sex with her. After something so traumatic she is going to be very sensitive, it may have triggered a specific feeling for her that she had while being raped. My advice is if she asks this of you again, tell her no and just hold her. Believe me, I know there are NO instant fixes to overcoming emotions of being raped. I'm 19 and my abuse began when I was 3 or 4 and still affects me today. Be supportive, but at the same time don't let it hurt you too. Both of you being negatively affected by this is no good. Do what you can handle, and after direct her to someone who can help her further.

Just remember, it's NOT your fault what happened during this. But once again my advice is tell her no if she asks again.
   
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Re: WTF - November 30th 2009, 07:57 AM

I think it is great you listened regardless of how hard it was. i tried to tell my fiance and talk about it, but he refused and said he didnt want to discuss it. next if she expects you to listen maybe you can gently let her know that its hard to hear it because you love her and feel really bad for what happened to her. . . but it would be better if you both werent intimate while she is still sensitive. . . making love should be both partners sharing something special, it shouldnt be something used to cope with a previous incident or something to get fixed. tell her no, but do explain it isnt because you dont want too, but that you believe its better this way and that you'll do anything to help her. That when you feel like she's ready to be intimate again and after she's understanding than together can decide when you both are ready. i hope all works out.
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Re: WTF - December 2nd 2009, 01:27 PM

She wont talk to me now. Im so fucking confused. I cant take this anymore. These games are fucking with my head so bad I dont even know what to fucking do anymore. Its making me so aggreesive lately I just want to freak out on someone. God damn. Sorry I just need to vent girl is pushing me to my breaking point. She is acting like I raped her the other night. Fucking raped her. I stopped every single fucking time she sad the word no. Id stop and tell her I didnt wanna do this anymore. And try to pull out but she would hold me to her chest and beg me to keep going. She said "Please don't stop" and "I love you" so Id start again and she was start crying and hit me and say no again Id fucking stop and say I CANT DO THIS I WANNA STOP and she would say "DONT STOP" what the fuck am I suppose to do?! I was the one who finally stopped it I had to basically rip myself away from her cuz she kept wrapping her arms and legs around me if I tried to pull away. And now my friend calls me from school saying he heard my girl saying I tried to force her into sex cuz I was mad she was talking with other guys. Fucking bullshit. I cant believe she would ever say this. I love her but I dont know anymore. I dont know man. I dont wanna give up on her but she is killing me. Im so fucked up lately. I cant even describe it. Idk fucked up. I cant take this anymore. Why cant I just fucking fix this.
   
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Re: WTF - December 2nd 2009, 05:15 PM

this isnt your problem to fix. however i wish we
can all have someone who can fix our problems.
this is her (sorry to say) weird way of handling it.
her telling other guys that you forced her is a
very very serious situation. i'd tell an adult or
someone else what is going on. Since alot of
guys are known to play a protective role in
female lives, you can get hurt from this
physically or get hurt from this by the law.
i believe you'll need to write her or try to
talk to her with another person there to
discuss what is going on and why she is
saying certain things. if this is your breaking
point this isnt your fault. its very
understandable. i'm not suggesting to
break up with her, but dont have sex until
she is getting help. i'm sorry your going
through this and i hope all works out for you
and her. Also i'd print copies of your posting
if it is difficult for you to explain to someone
else what is going on.

if you need anyone to talk too, pm me anytime!


History is His story. - A Purpose Driven Life.
(By the way. Need anyone to talk to? my
yahoo messenger is open 24/7. feel free
to im me. ;])
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