Male Advice Preferred: Male Survivors?

[AmethystDrew]

I was raped during my Frosh Week last year. He forced me to go down on him, and told me that I would never be able to convince someone that I was raped because of the fact that I both got erect and came myself. Even though I know that these were solely physiological reactions, it still hit me hard, and I didn't bring him to the justice he deserved.

I just want to know if there are any other men out there who are survivors - and, if you're reading this because you're like I used to be and wondering if you're one-in-a-million... I want to let you know that you're not alone, and that my PM box is always open.

[Pink Ranger]

It's not very well known on here, and I won't go into detail about it, but understand that you're not alone either. Don't ever let someone tell you that you liked it, or deserved it, because you got an erection or came because of it. It's the body's natural reaction to external stimuli, that's all it is. And, what happened was hardly your fault. I know it was last year, I know you still have your bad days, your good days, and those in between. If you need anything at all, feel free to message me. I know this is a crappy reply to your post, and I apologize for that, but I'm attempting to say all I can at the moment given where I am.

[Casey.]

Hey Drew,

So I'm not a guy, which means my opinion probably won't count for much here, but it is what it is. The human body responses to touch, some guys get exertions from just getting touched. You can't force your body to not response to touch, it does it naturally. What the body sees as pleasure is sometimes the most horrible thing that your mind can comprehend. He was trying to make you feel guilty, like it was your fault, but it wasn't your fault. You're not alone, you know? There are a lot of guys out there who have been sexually assaulted, many are too ashamed to admit it. Even though they have nothing to be ashamed of, no more than any girl does.

Take care.

[Blau]

Aww dude thats weak, almost happened to me, but i dodged the blow

[PurpleMustang]

Hi Drew,

I'm not male but I felt the need to respond because your post kind of hit home. I really hope you're okay now. I understand how traumatizing an event like this could be and it's horrible to think that so many people experience this kind of thing. It's sickening.

I see you're from Toronto; very close to where I live. Knowing that this kind of thing can happen so close to where I live sends goosebumps up my back. I didn't really realize that something so horrible can happen so close to home. In fact, many people think/feel that way.

I will be moving away for university next year and will be living in residence. I know that Frosh Week is extremely hyped up and is supposed to be one of the best weeks of your life. I'm really sorry that yours was ruined. I bet you didn't expect that from your Frosh Week - or from university, for that matter. I bet that you were looking forward to university and to Frosh Week just like everyone else and it's so unfortunate that you had to experience this...during a time you thought you'd be safe.

Again, I'm really sorry that you had to deal with this. I could only imagine how traumatizing it must have been for you. You should be very proud of yourself for posting this, though, and getting through it the way that you have done. That takes a big person. Know that there are people you can trust but also, some that you can't. Don't close yourself off to people in general. I've learned that is not the answer when you've been hurt.

If you ever need to talk, feel free to send me a shout. My PM box is always open.

Stay strong and keep fighting.