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kc_82 Offline
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Unhappy What's Happening? - April 5th 2010, 12:33 AM

About 5 years ago I was taken advantage of by a friend of my dad's. I had never even been kissed before and this man who was 20 years older than me was my frist kiss. My dad was dying and he took advantage of me in that time and after he died. I did everything but actual intercourse with this guy. He was also married with kids. Well it turned into a scandal and I was called a liar because of his position in the community. Through counseling I have learned that this is not my fault.

Two months after this, I was assualted by a man. I don't like the R word. Well I never reported it because of the situation with my dad's friend. I really thought I have overcome these things. However, lately I have find old memories of the assualt coming back. I see him on top of me and I am saying no. Well last night, I had a memory of my dad's friend on top of me rubbing himself against me. I do not know why all this is coming back, but it is. I cried already today over the assualt again, it's all coming back. What is happening to me?
   
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Re: What's Happening? - April 5th 2010, 05:59 AM

Hey there.

I'm so sorry you have had to go through these things. Unfortunately, there will be times in your life where they pop back up and seem to bother you more. It's a fairly normal thing to experience especially if you are going through any major events in your life. I think the best thing you can do is surround yourself with support. Talk to people about what you're going through and maybe give therapy a try again, even if it's just for a little while. It's okay to need help. It takes everyone different amounts of time to heal so just be good to yourself and don't be afraid to reach out.

I hope you're doing okay right now. You can PM me if you ever want to talk.
<3 Emily


"Sometimes it's a struggle to be not who you want to be, not who you used to be, not who you're going to be,
but just being right where you are, who you are"

   
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Re: What's Happening? - April 9th 2010, 06:44 PM

I was sexually assulted by my great grandpa when I was 7. Its always there, even though Ive moved on. Its not something you'll forget unfortunately. And you're right it was not your fault. You need to find way to come to terms with what happened. It was a bad thing that happened to you, yes, but look at who you are today, your personality, the friends you've made and how strong you are. I know you're strong because you're telling us your story. Talking about it will help too, which is what we're here for.
   
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