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I'm so afraid. - April 28th 2010, 07:36 PM

Okay, so I created a thread a few days ago about the abuse I've received over the years from my parents. I saw my therapist yesterday and I talked to her about it. If I can't convince my parents to get help, she... wants to call the social services. I am so distraught over this. She says they won't take me or my sister away, but I'm not afraid of that. I'm afraid of my parents' reaction. Calling in the social services will make them unbelievably mad.

From the time I was little, my mother always told me that you never betray your family. You never share your family's secrets. And I just did that yesterday. I know this probably sounds odd, but even though they hurt me, I feel a fierce loyalty towards my parents. I feel like I've done something horribly wrong. I've just revealed our secret. Logically, I know I've done the right thing but... I still feel so guilty.

I guess I'm just going to have to pray that I'm able to coax them into therapy. Otherwise, I'm doomed. I'm going to try tonight after dinner. Wish me luck.
   
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Re: I'm so afraid. - April 28th 2010, 09:20 PM

Hey there hun. I think it was extremely brave of you to open up to your therapist and tell her what's going on. You should be really proud of yourself.

Just do your best to get them to get help and try therapy. If it doesn't work, things will be okay. Social services is just there to help. In the end you did what's right for you and that's what matters. You deserve a safe place to live and grow up in.

And it's okay to feel a loyalty towards your family. It's a completely normal feeling no matter how you have been treated by them. But you and your sister's safety is never worth keeping a secret like this. You did the right thing.

I hope things are okay for you right now. You're doing amazing - keep your chin up. I'm here if you ever need to talk.
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Re: I'm so afraid. - April 29th 2010, 02:39 AM

I think u are really brave and it was the right thing to do! I know i can't do that and i am in a situation similar to yours. You should be proud o yourself! Good luck!
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Re: I'm so afraid. - April 29th 2010, 09:44 PM

Sarafina, what you did - telling your therapist - is the best way forward. You know you can't keep living like this, so something has to be done! Social services will merely talk to your parents, and offer them help. It's nothing to be afraid of.

If your parents honestly took the time to listen to you like we all have done, then they would realise that it's tearing you up, and hurting you. They would see themselves what they are doing, but unfortunately they won't listen, they won't even take the time to look at what they re doing.

Even if social services do get involved, it's probably for the best. They can help you, and then, maybe your parents will see the seriousness of what they're doing to you.

Like I've said, I can totally relate, and you don't deserve this, you really don't. Wishing you the best of luck


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Re: I'm so afraid. - May 1st 2010, 07:09 PM

Thanks, Laura!

So far, so good. My parents have actually agreed to therapy. How long they'll stick with it, I'm not sure, but I'm on cloud nine right now. We might actually be able to work this through and develop some semblance of a family.
   
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Re: I'm so afraid. - May 3rd 2010, 03:20 AM

That's great Sarafina! I'm glad your parents agreed to get help, and I'm so proud of you for talking to me and being honest with your therapist. Just hang in there and stay strong.


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Re: I'm so afraid. - May 5th 2010, 09:46 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cas* View Post
That's great Sarafina! I'm glad your parents agreed to get help, and I'm so proud of you for talking to me and being honest with your therapist. Just hang in there and stay strong.
Thank you so much! For about a week, my parents have actually been really good. I'm surprised. Guess all they needed was to be threatened with the social services!

Really, though, they've been doing pretty well.
   
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Re: I'm so afraid. - May 8th 2010, 08:22 AM

That's really good to hear. I'm really proud of you, for telling someone about this.


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Re: I'm so afraid. - May 8th 2010, 11:33 AM

Its good that you have told someone
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Re: I'm so afraid. - May 8th 2010, 01:13 PM

Thank you, guys!
   
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