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Shopaholic Offline
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Layers - June 5th 2010, 01:57 AM

I just remembered that my step brother did something to me. It happened a long time ago 4 years ago. I know I should not me mad at myself for rembemering but I am. I told my mom but she does not believe me. All though my mom and step dad are not together anymore. My therapist does believe me. But I can't bring myself to talk to her about it. It just seems as I talk about something then something new and worse is underneath it. It is really annoying I know I'm not making these things up but my head is spinning out of control. I can't stop cutting and wanting to just end everything. I hate myself for saying this but I just don't think this life is worth doing anymore.

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Re: Layers - June 5th 2010, 05:26 AM

Life is worth it Meg. You can get through this. It sucks that your mum doesn't believe you, but your therapist does and I do. All that really matters is that you believe yourself. Remembering things can be really hard and tough sometimes, but dealing with the underlying issues is the only way to get better. The only way to heal. Just hang in there Meg. You can get through this.

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Re: Layers - June 6th 2010, 03:32 PM

First off, I'm sorry that you have to deal with this. It's a traumatic experience, but life is one of the most beautiful things, because we only get one. And you're never alone. You've already taken a huge first step by going to therapy, and talking about what happened will come naturally. You never have to say anything you don't want too, and that's perfectly okay. Some people just need the right person to listen first, and coming here where there's tons of people is a good thing.

But hun, cutting isn't healthy. And I know that is something most people already know. Don't be mad at yourself for making those choices though because we all have to learn. I understand that it's a way for you to get out your anger or just because you want to be in control- but maybe that's one of the first things you can work out with your therapist. If you don't want to talk about what happened w/ your step-brother, you can work on helping control your urges. And if you haven't told your therapist that you've cut, maybe telling her that will open door to talk about this incident. Maybe you've heard this before, but what happened to you doesn't define who you are- you choose what you want to become.

I'm always just a PM away Meg.

Never regret anything because at one time, it's exactly what you wanted. PM me. (:

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Re: Layers - June 12th 2010, 03:03 AM

I saw him today. And I'm so scared.

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Re: Layers - June 12th 2010, 05:21 AM

Im really sorry about what happened to you. No one deserves that, especially you. Its happened to me before too, but that was by a couple of twin girls when I was three, so its easier to forget about it. It was great of you to go to a therapist, though. That was really brave of you. If you want your mom to believe you, you should talk to her and your therapist at the same time, so your mom could realize how serious it is.
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Re: Layers - June 12th 2010, 12:50 PM

I agree with what everyone has said here so far. You really cannot be getting angry at yourself for it. It's not your fault.

Mitch has a very good idea about talking to both your mum and therapist at the same time. That way your mum will be able to talk it through, rather than go into denial about it (which is what it is).

I'm sorry you've had to deal with this for so long, no one deserves that.
Keep strong

So much for that idea ...

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Re: Layers - June 20th 2010, 12:18 PM

Yeah, I agree with Mitch. Talking to your therapist and mother at the same time is a great idea. And don't be afraid of him. BE STRONG!!!!
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