Triggering: how do i stop flashbacks?

[Amanda-Marie]

i thought i was getting better but i think i just might be getting worse again....i keep on having flashbacks about the things that happened to me and this one guy i have to cross paths with every week has the exact same eyes he looks similar to a man that did some things to me and i cant really make eye contact with him and sometimes his face like all of the sudden seems like its the guys but then i realize its not and it goes back to normal...and so when i met him i like purposely tried to seem weird so he wouldn't be near me and it would be easier to avoid him which i kinda do sometimes...but now i just feel weird around him and bad for being like that cuz its not his fault hes not the guy he just really looks like him.... and ive mostly been able to keep my problems away from my schoolwork but i try to practice my piano or draw and i cant because everything comes back to me and i find that ive run to my bed again but as soon as i hit my bed i get a huge amount of flashbacks and my body starts like shaking and mi heart pumps like crazy....idk what to do i dont want to go back to all the stress and horrible feelings i dealt with last year i just am getting out of this! how do i stop it all and change this?

[Amanda-Marie]

ok fine i guess noone cares ...its alright i might not be around much longer anyways

[luvflamingos]

I care Amanda-Marie. I just didn't know how to respond. I have flashbacks too. All the time. I was raped several years ago. And share many of the same feelings you are experiencing. I haven't been able to tell my therapist about it either. So I just wanted you to know that people do care. Is there someone there you trust and that you can talk too? I probably haven't helped you in any way, but I do care.

[Neoscryer]

You're not alone. I wish I had an answer for you, I really do. But I'm as desperate for the answer to your question as I imagine you are. If you ever need to talk, you can PM me.

I wish this comment was more helpful.

Though I do have one thing to tell you: thank you for being brave enough to ask a question I still haven't been able to.

[lostandalone]

Hi Amanda-Marie. Please don't think no-one cares. I also care.
Like what Mary said, I too reccomend that you need to talk to someone you trust, a freind, therapist, etc I know its difficult at first but it helps to lessen the effects and occurances of the flashbacks.

I have been through it. It is sad you are too.
But you can get through this.

[~CourageousSurvivor~]

Hey there,

I am sorry it took me so long to respond but I didn't know the best response to the question. It took me a while to think of how to respond. Don't ever think that you are not cared about because that is far from the truth.

Hun, I really do hate to break it to you but you cannot just END the flashbacks. The way to get them to stop is to deal with the abuse and slowly they will fade. Healing is a long and involved process but it is possible. As you heal from this the flashbacks will begin to fade and you can start feeling better. The best way to heal from this is to seek some support; go to a therapist, join a support group. Talk about the things that have happened, deal with them and with time you might notice the flashbacks lessening.

Until then please hang in there.

Jenna

[Amanda-Marie]

well thank you for everyone who commented you are very kind people and thanks for the advice for those who gave some i was hoping that i could end flashbacks but i guess not lol although im just frustrated because i thought they were gone and then they came back . My parents finally know what actually happened but not full detail and not everything. I would never have the courage to go talking about it like that to people ....it took me so long to even tell my parents or type it to my really close friends...i cant even say the actual words or terms for the things that happened to me bc i dont want to cry infront of people see i cant even type them either like it takes alot of effort...so idk how i would start talking to people like that i guess im just doomed

[~CourageousSurvivor~]

Hey there,

You are not hopeless. Talking about my abuse is really hard too. You know, I hardly ever say my abusers names? I just say, they or he or whatever. It is a slow process but you can get through this.

Are you in therapy? Are you considering it? If so tell your therapist that you can't talk about it. That you are struggling with that and, a good therapist, will help you slowly work on talking about it. They will go at your own pace, they won't push it and they will not mind if you cry in front of them. You know, crying is not a bad thing and I think crying over the abuse and the things lost because of it and crying over the anger and other emotions is a good healing tool. Why not embrace it?

You can get through this you just can't be so hard on yourself and remember that healing is a process and baby steps are the best way to go.

If you need anything feel free to pm me.

Jenna