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Angry I am so horribull... - June 20th 2011, 06:26 PM

I am so horribul to my girlfriend, i beat her up yesterday because she told me told me she was pregnant and she is keeping it. I didnt mean to do it, it just happen and i feel so guity now because i know what i have just done. I dont even know why she is still with me because if i was her i would just leave asap.
   
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Re: I am so horribull... - June 20th 2011, 07:15 PM

Hey there,

I think its great you've realised that you've done wrong and even better that you're unhappy about it. If this was a sudden outburst of anger, you need to get help. Talk to someone who can help you control it, consider anger managment or something similar.

You need to make sure your girlfriend is okay too. It's wrong that you did this but since you have now, you need to make sure she gets the care she needs. Also, she is carrying a child, so take her to the hospital to find out if the baby is okay. It may be a shock that she's pregnant, but it's not just her fault. You played a part in this too by getting her pregnant, therefore you need to be just as much a part of the pregnancy as she is. If she's keeping this baby, you're gonna need to be there for her, otherwise there's no use you being there at all. Remember this baby is yours. You need to support both of them.

Make sure she's okay with the pregnancy but dont force her into anything. You're young and no doubt so is she so be careful. In the future control the outbursts of anger you get. Get the help you need and take care of her and the baby. If she does decide to leave you, don't freak out on her, let her go.

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Re: I am so horribull... - June 22nd 2011, 02:02 AM

As posted above, I'm glad you have realized that you have a problem and more importantly are seeking help. You need to talk to your girlfriend and make sure that you are now supporting/ taking care of her and your child like you need to.

You should seek anger management classes. It happened once, but that doesn't mean that it could never happen again. You need to make sure you get some help for yourself so you can be an acceptable role model for your child.

I wish you and your girlfriend the best of luck!


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Re: I am so horribull... - June 22nd 2011, 08:35 AM

You made a mistake, that's not grounds for seeking professional help. It was an outburst in a stressful even, it's not like it doesn't happen. It was wrong, and you accepted that fact. However if you are prone to often violent outbursts, then you should seek help.

As for her decision keeping the child, it is your decision if you want to stay or leave.


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Re: I am so horribull... - June 23rd 2011, 01:17 AM

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Originally Posted by Sythan View Post
You made a mistake, that's not grounds for seeking professional help.
The way I see it, beating up your girlfriend in a time of absolute fear and weakness is perfect ground for seeking professional help.

The good thing Jamie is that you recognize that you have a problem, and that you know that you need to do something about it. People can change if they want to, and with dedication and effort you can definitely make yourself a better person in the long run.
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Sythan Offline
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Re: I am so horribull... - June 23rd 2011, 03:23 AM

Seeking help at 14 years old for making a mistake brought on by the fear of your life being recked and possibly being looked down upon or disowned by your friends and family makes no sense.


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Re: I am so horribull... - June 23rd 2011, 04:57 AM

Yes, so let it have the chance of possibly getting worse instead of nipping it in the bud -__-
   
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Re: I am so horribull... - June 23rd 2011, 12:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sythan View Post
You made a mistake, that's not grounds for seeking professional help. It was an outburst in a stressful even, it's not like it doesn't happen. It was wrong, and you accepted that fact. However if you are prone to often violent outbursts, then you should seek help.

As for her decision keeping the child, it is your decision if you want to stay or leave.
I'm sorry, but beating up a pregnant girl regardless of the circumstances is not a mistake. It is physical abuse and that is most definitely grounds for seeking professional help. It's not like he just yelled at her or he punched a wall or something. His girlfriend could miscarry or could have suffered very severe injuries. How can you possibly act like that is totally understandable?

And whilst you are right in that it is his choice to stay or leave, it was presumably his choice to have sex knowing that it could result in pregnancy. Just because he doesn't have to actually carry the child doesn't mean that he shouldn't take responsibility for it.


Jamie, I agree with what most other people have said. Reacting in that way is not acceptable and you really need to seek professional help to deal with it. Even if this is the first time that you have had such an outburst, it will almost certainly not be the last time unless you get help now. I think it is fantastic that you realise that what you did was wrong, but knowing that won't necessarily solve the problem in the future. Please go and speak to a school counsellor as soon as possible; they will be able to help you or refer you to someone who can.



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