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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Linds Offline
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Name: Lindsey
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Tonight.. - October 11th 2011, 04:03 AM

...I am hurting. I am crying and rushing to clean myself up. I have to hurry. I have to cover the soon to be new bruises and make my lip stop bleeding. I have to change clothes and hide the bloody ones. It hurts to breathe. My head is spinning but I have to hurry. My boyfriend can't see me like this. Ugh time is aginst me tonight. He'll be hear soon. Why did he have to hear my dad yelling? At least he lives outside of town. It gives me time to cover it up. It gives me time to make it seem like he just yelled and nothing else. A drug addict and a case of concrete stairs beat me tonight. They bruised my body and cursed me. I felt the painful blows of fist and boots and stairs. Why did this have to happen tonight? I don't think I'll be able to cover everything. Lost of make up and maybe a big hoodie will help? Yes, A big soft hoodie to cover up my arms and comfort my body. Hurry, not much time left he'll be pulling up any minute. Where is dad now? Crap, I lost him. Maybe he left or maybe he's in the shed shooting up. Lets hope he isn't close. He can't hear the car. He can't stop my get away plan I don't know what I would do if he did. My wrist hurts, I don't think I can really move it. Oh geez, what if he tries to hug me? It's going to be so painful, and if he kisses me it will be even more obvious. Ugh so much make up, but it's working. You can't hardly tell anything. Now time to wait outside for my ride. Hmm What story to tell tongiht. I knocked over his beer and he beat the crap out of me? Hmm no i think I'll go with he was mad cause I didn't clean my room again and I tripped being my normal clumsy self on the stairs. I hope it works. Do you think it will work? How can I make it work?
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Tonight.. - October 11th 2011, 06:37 AM

Why are you trying to hide it? Don't be ashamed because of what someone else has done to you. Its not your fault and you sure as heck don't deserve it. Please do everything you can to get out of your situation.

PM me if you need anything.


"You know I'm such a fool for you"

PRIDE<3
(I have accepted myself as of October 20, 2011)
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Tonight.. - October 11th 2011, 01:50 PM

I understand wanting to hide it from the general public, but why from your boyfriend? If you tell the people closest to you what's going on, you won't be piling the anxiety of hiding on top of the pain of abuse. Don't pressure yourself to pretend you are okay.


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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Linds Offline
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Re: Tonight.. - October 11th 2011, 01:59 PM

If my boyfriend(lets call him M) knew (I think he kinda does but won't say it out loud) He would go off the deep end. He's not one for abusing girls. He thinks it's one of the lowest things you can do if you're a man. I'm afraid to know what he would do to my dad and I know he would never let me go back there again. It's not that I like what my dad does or does to me but I'm all he has left. My mom and brother left and haven't looked back. I take care of him and without me I don't know what he would do. And I know for a fact that M would never let me set foot in that house again and I couldn't stand knowing I left my dad too. Me and my dad were really close when I was younger. He was my hero and I can't let my hero down can I?
   
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Re: Tonight.. - October 12th 2011, 01:33 AM

You wouldn't be letting him down, he is the one that has has let you down, badly. Very badly. He should not need someone to take care of him like this and he has no right to treat you this way, period. I think for your safety, he needs to be forcibly submitted to rehab and you need to start a life away from him. Also your boyfriend cares about you, he needs to know the truth.
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