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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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justme1119 Offline
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I hurt my brother - November 26th 2011, 12:20 AM

I feel like I have always hurt him abused him by saving myself and not saying anything. He's 8 and I was 9 when it started. I just at first let it happen I felt I didn't tell and I was made to believe I deserved it and therefore no one would sympathize in the first place. But when I was 11 I told my dad about how my mom's bf would beat me and eventually he got me out of there when I was 11. I don't know I sometimes worry if he's abusing him. I haven't said anything in 3 years. It's his kid so I mean would it even matter what I said? But I feel horrible to know this. I feel as bad as my mom's bf advice?
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Re: I hurt my brother - November 26th 2011, 03:17 AM

this isn't your fault, try not to think that way at all. you were so young there was nothing really you could have done. i would try giving him a call maybe or maybe your mom a call? just keep your hopes up.

"My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return. "
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Re: I hurt my brother - November 26th 2011, 03:56 AM

You have no reason to feel guilty. You were so young. There was nothing you could have done. You were simply focused on self-preservation. There's nothing wrong with that. Have you tried to contact your brother since then? If you haven't, maybe you could try. If he hints that he's still being abused, let someone know right away. But, don't beat yourself up over the things that you wish you would have done. It's in the past. PM/VM me if you ever need someone to talk to.
Take care,

wanderlust consumed her;
foreign hearts & exotic minds compelled her.
she had a gypsy soul
and a vibrant heart for the unknown.
-d. marie
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Re: I hurt my brother - November 26th 2011, 06:09 AM

I can't tell my mom she knows everything. Before I left he wasn't being abused at all that I knew of I always wondered if it was that he could never hurt his own like he did Mya and I. S I don't know it's I guess just that iremember when I was 8 and 7. I remember he was quite physically abusive almost in a bad way. Even though I was treated like family until I was 9.
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Re: I hurt my brother - November 28th 2011, 06:59 AM

Since you have left and you dont see him that often, It will be hard to do anything for him.

You can blame yourself or feel guilty, you got out of there which you should have. Eventually your stepdad will get what he deserves - to be arrested in a jail cell.

I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
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Re: I hurt my brother - November 29th 2011, 12:34 AM

Don't blame yourself for what happened. You had no control nor do you have control today.

You can mention something to your dad and see if he will do anything, but its a shame your mom is still with him if she knows her husband was beating you like that, but like previous posters said, it was to protect you.

But are you talking to your brother?

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain

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