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Unhappy HELP ME triggered memories are breaking me apart - November 26th 2011, 07:13 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of rape or abuse, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Broken I knew I was molested when I was 7 at a summer camp i used to go to, it went on for about 4 days , my camp Counsilor got sick so she had to go home and because of such short notice we had to combine cabins with a boys but us girls were in a separate room but now had a male camp Counsilor. One night he came into our cabin after the campfire and told me my parents had phoned and he had to walk me to the main office which was through the woods. So he was walking with me with the flashlight so we could see and the all of a sudden he turned off the flashlight and I couldn't see anything and all I felt was him pick me up and lay me down on the ground and he said that I was his special little camper and he wanted to show me how special I was all I remembered him doing was touching me and kissing my stomach. He said If I told my parents would hate me and everyone would think I'm lying so I haven't said anything. Im now 16 and have my first boyfriend we've been dating for about 4 months we've kissed and stuff but the other night we were lying on my bed doing homework and he kind of got over top of me and started kissing me that was okay but when he started pulling up my shirt I freaked out and pushed him off I started crying because a rush of memories flooded back , i never told him about what happend so he felt horrible apologizing saying he'd never pressure me to do something I didn't want to do, I broke down and told him what had happend and he just held me as I cried , that night I had more flashbacks then usual they were more detailed and he did more things to me then I thought, he made me do things to him like oral and fisting him and he went down on me and fingered me. I'm freaking out because I always thought he just touched me and nothing more but now everytime my boyfriend makes advances i have flashbacks of when I was seven and I cant get passes it. So my question is dis these things really happen or am I imagining things did things between my boyfriend and I trigger buried down memories.please help it's so hard to deal with I'm lost
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Re: HELP ME triggered memories are breaking me apart - November 27th 2011, 05:25 AM

I am very sorry about what happened to you. I have also been molested by someone and have had to deal with the flashbacks and everything. You can get through it. If you need to talk, you can feel free to PM me anytime.
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Re: HELP ME triggered memories are breaking me apart - November 27th 2011, 07:44 PM

I would say that he really did do these things, and i really think you need to tell soemone, because they WOULD believe you. tell your parents or a counselor or something, but the best thing would be getting things out in the open for the adults to see, because when you are able to do that, then you will be able to deal with the memories better and you will know how to face them.

You have done NOTHING wrong

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Kill them with your kindness
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'Cause they don't even know you
All they see is SCARS
They don't see the ANGEL
Living in your heart
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Re: HELP ME triggered memories are breaking me apart - December 5th 2011, 11:29 PM

When something tragic happens to a child there is a big chance that it will cause them to repress memories.
So yes , it is possible that it triggered one of those memories.

Like Sorakat said , it would be harder to deal with it if you just keep it to your self, it would be better if you face them now and tell an adult.
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abuse, ashamed, breaking, flashbacks, memories, molestation, triggered

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