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Compassion and empathy - December 17th 2011, 08:44 PM

So, I have been confronting the abuse of my past and telling people and going about the process of filing a police report. And, I find myself struggling with the fact that so many people believe me and want to see me get justice. My therapist and I talked about the police report and I told her how in all reality I don't want justice for me because I already had to deal with the consequences; what I want is for them to be stopped so they cannot harm any more children and hopefully their previous victims (if there are any) can get help and they won't have to go through as much as I have. I mean no matter what their victims are going to have to struggle but if they can be heard and get help it might not get as bad? Anyway, I was telling my therapist this and she said that she understood where I was coming from but she also wanted to see me get justice. She wanted them to go away for a long time. And it is so hard to have people show compassion and empathy for it.

And the more I find people showing compassion/empathy and believing my story the harder I find it to deal with and the more scared I get. It is so convoluted and I don't know how to explain it exactly but I guess when you go one feeling as though no one is going to ever believe you and then you find that people do believe you it is very strange and scary and new?

But, I am unsure and I just needed some words of encouragement or to see if anyone else has had this happen before?

Thanks.


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Re: Compassion and empathy - December 17th 2011, 08:56 PM

I can completely see where you're coming from with this. You can get used to just having no one believe you or understand. Now that they are, it can be overwhelming for you. You're grateful that it is getting taken care of, but you're not used to all the caring and concern they're showing. I was in a similar situation and it was hard, but it will get better for you. You can PM me anytime if you want to talk about anything. Stay strong.
   
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Re: Compassion and empathy - December 17th 2011, 09:29 PM

Hi Jenna. :-)

I know exactly how you're feeling. I was molested for three years from age eight til age 11 and raped at age 10. I didn't tell anyone until nearly five years later when I was almost 16. I kept it a secret because the person who did it to me was my mom's friend's son. I thought no one would believe me. I thought no one cared and if they did, they would've noticed that something was wrong. When I started telling people, I felt weird. Everyone I told felt bad for me and urged me to press charges. After hiding for so long, I felt like everyone was pressuring me to do something that should've been done years ago. But after a while, I got used to the feelings of compassion that many people, including my therapist, gave me. Now, I'm told NOT to talk about it. It's hard but I still go to therapy and she's helping me. So it's okay.

All I can say as words of encouragement is that it will get better and you ARE doing the right thing. I promise. You're so strong for reporting what happened for you and for past/future victims. I'm proud of you. <3

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