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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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Nightmare Offline
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Night Terrors from Parental Abuse - February 23rd 2012, 04:40 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of rape or abuse, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

This is my first post in a while but necessity prompts me to return to teenhelp.

My girlfriend has had a long history of being abused by her father in every which way, culminating in him raping her at least once several months ago. To my knowledge, it has not happened since. We've talked to protective services and the school guidance councilors and the police except nothing has ever come of it.
From this abuse, she began having terrible nightmares, wake-up-at-night-sweating nightmares about it. She seldom tells me what they're actually about but they generally revolve around the abuse she had gone through. I was able to quell the nightmares by staying on the phone with her and helping her through the night and she was no longer afraid of going to bed and things seemed to be getting better.
Recently however, we've become sexually active - we haven't had intercourse yet, but most things your average couple does leading up to that. Since then her nightmares have come back, possibly stronger than they were months ago, and I'm at a loss of how to help her. I'm at least somewhat responsible; I had a feeling that if we were sexually active there would be a consequence like this but I don't know how to help her overcome her nightmares, sleep soundly at night, or be able to get past this in the future if she ever does want to have sex with anybody (Not myself necessarily, but a future lover/fiance/etc.).

Is there anything I can do, that we can do, or that she can do besides getting professional help that would help her through these horrible night terrors and flashbacks to that hell????


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Re: Night Terrors from Parental Abuse - February 23rd 2012, 01:26 PM

Well to be honest, the best option would probably be for her to see a therapist so they can help her move past what's happened to her. It's not going to be easy, but I think with the help of a professional, it could be easier to work through. Just remember to be there for her when she needs to talk about things. You can try to just go slowly with her, but I still think your best bet is professional help seeing as a therapist will be able to help her unlock these memories she's holding in and find ways to move past them. I wish I could help more but really, I think a therapist is your best option.


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Re: Night Terrors from Parental Abuse - February 23rd 2012, 03:36 PM

I agree, the only thing I could think of that would really help would be to speak with a therapist or counselor. Maybe if she found someone (possibly you?) that she felt comfortable enough to talk with about these things might help a bit. Sometimes just getting them out in the open can take a bit of weight off of a person's shoulders, but again I still think the best people for that would be therapists or counselors as they're trained for this sort of thing. It's called professional help for a reason.

Hopefully things work out and keep us updated.


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Re: Night Terrors from Parental Abuse - February 26th 2012, 12:20 AM

Im currently going through those night terrors and the only thing that helps me is medication
   
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Re: Night Terrors from Parental Abuse - February 26th 2012, 02:08 AM

meds dont always help with nightmares. It could be ptsd shes going through the night mares. I have been through nightmares its not fun. Keep talking to the police and child protective services UNTILL THEY LISTEN DONTTT STOP UNTILL THEY GET HER AAWAY FROM HER ABUSSERES KEEP TALKING OT THEM UNTILL THEY LITEN DONT GIVE UP. bE THERE FOR YOUR FRIEND LET HER CALL YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT WHEN SHE wakes up from the night mares. Just listen let her cry on your shoulder. Jus tbe there for her and she wont feel alone. Your a good friend.
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Re: Night Terrors from Parental Abuse - February 27th 2012, 06:33 AM

What? Why arnt the Child Protective Services doing anything?
It could be a good idea to find her a counsler, there are free ones avaliable.
Best of luck.
   
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