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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Ementine Offline
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Name: Kaliska Oldenquist
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Another Arugement...Because I don't see it - July 18th 2012, 08:04 AM

Me and my friend had another disarrangement because I can't stand my body, everyone else says I am fine the way I am. Weather they had seen me naked or not, they say I'm fine.
I have a major issue accepting that my breasts are fine the way they are. I know I have mentioned this before, but it's still a major problem in my life. One is a C the other a B. I keep being told that I am fine the way I am. But I just don't see it, I see something that isn't right but can't be fixed. I am afraid of surgery and if I got it done I wouldn't be able to breast feed later on in life. Nor do I have the money anyway.
But I've tried everything and none of it works right because I know that there is something wrong with me. I don't want to be made fun of for it. Every option is out of the question because I can't afford anything. I have to just deal with it but I am desperate to find a solution.
I want to just rip my body apart and rebuild it the way it should be.

I'm 5'6, blond hair, dyed brown, uneven breasts, and dull blue-ish green eyes.

The way I see myself is a little shorter, even breasts, natrual brown hair and brighter blue eyes. The only thing I can do is keep dying my hair brown. The rest I have to just suffer and cover up all the time

I've never been made fun of for it, but I've been afraid that I will be. My BF makes a point to say that he loves my breasts the way they are, but I hate it when he does that. Nor do I like taking my clothes off at all. I try and stay covered.

If you have advice, please give it but keep in mind, I can't do tharapy or surgery. Nor do I have any money at all.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Another Arugement...Because I don't see it - July 18th 2012, 09:43 AM

Well, you could try getting your boyfriend to explain to you exactly why he likes you the way you are, that could help.

In my experience, for most guys, boobs are boobs, and they don't notice size difference - unless maybe you had an A cup paired with a D cup, but that's a difference anybody would notice.

Some good news though - between 16 and 25ish, when you've stopped growing vertically, breasts do tend to even out to roughly the same cup-size, so although you notice the difference rather a lot now, it's unlikely to be a permanent thing.

As for height, that's pretty much bang on average height. I personally would never want to be shorter, it's hard enough to reach that last item on the top shelf at the supermarket as it is - and I'm 5'7". (Also I hate having to try and find staff members to assist me.)

And maybe your friends/boyfriend have a point - could be that you're perfectly normal, and just happen to be a perfectionist with a (mildly) unrealistic ideal of what you should be. Nobody can do therapy over the internet, but if you find a book on mindfulness (perhaps your local library has one) and learn about things like acceptance and being in the moment, you'll focus less on what you think you should be, and more on enjoying what you actually have - enjoying what you have is a great way to feel better about life in general.

For the eyes - if you want a purely cosmetic solution, I do know that it's possible to buy coloured contacts, they're kind of popular with high-school kids here.

But in the end, changing how you look isn't going to change who you are. People accept you as you are, so you obviously have more than just how you look working in your favour. Your personality and your interpretation of the world is going to sit with you far longer than your looks - you'll get old, you may shrink (osteoporosis and osteoarthritis both contribute to shrinking), your boobs will get saggy, your skin will wrinkle, you'll sunburn easily, scar and bruise easily, and your hair will lose its pigmentation. And when all that's happened, you will still be YOU!

Find ways to enjoy what you have, while you still have it.

Oh, and I believe many churches in the U.S.A. offer free counselling if you can handle the religion being blatantly thrown in your face on occasion. So there is that option too.

   
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Re: Another Arugement...Because I don't see it - July 18th 2012, 01:24 PM

hi
i just want you to know you are beautiful. Your eyes can deceive you sometimes and make you seem you aren't beautiful but you are. your beautiful in your own special way.
don't believe me...
ask the person you trust that will tell you the truth no matter what ask them if you are beautiful


YOUR BEAUTIFUL AND DON'T LET ANYONE NOT EVEN YOURSELF LET YOU THINK OTHERWISE




ďIíve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. Iíve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, Iíve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. Iíve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.Ē
- Michael Jordan


Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do.
- John Wooden
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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Another Arugement...Because I don't see it - July 18th 2012, 04:09 PM

Just like what the others have said, your body was made just for you. It's quite common for one of the breast to be a little bigger or smaller then the other one. Youo shouldn't let your body make you feel depressed. Sure, it's common to have body image issues, but we can't change our bodies; maybe throught cosmetic surgeries, but it's still your body. You are beautiful just the way you are.




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