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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
FixYou♥ Offline
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Unhappy Something wrong with my mind?...or something? - January 30th 2013, 05:48 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

So... I'm only 15, and I can't be diagnosed with any sort of personality disorders, but I feel like I have something wrong with my head. This is just me talking about a few of the hardest things for me to deal with.
Nightmares for starters. I have them, every night. Some involve my friends, others involve people that I don't know, whom I name. Like they are real almost. For example, my friend Matthew is in my nightmares quite often, and he tends to kill me in most of them. So now in real life, I'm scared of him. But in a nightmare or two, there's also a boy named Fade, and there's Rosie, and there's a couple of little girls.
I also hallucinate, the same girl, whom I named Julee. Yes, Julee, and she looks like... if you've seen "The Ring", she looks somewhat like that girl. Black eyes, black hair, pale skin. Every time I see her though, its totally random, and she usually has something different about her. For example, the first time I saw her, she wasn't wearing any clothes, the second time I saw her, which was about 5 months later, she was in a maroon-ish dress, but I only see her for about 2 seconds at most. So I honestly don't know much else.
I feel like these people, the made up ones in my nightmares and the hallucinations are controlling my mind like they are real. I talk about them to my friend like they exist. And frankly, I don't know why.
Another thing, in my nightmares, there tends to be the same references. Matches, flames, or fire. Long hallways and glowing exit signs. Gas masks and hospital rooms. Bridges. Mirrors. Blood.
A couple of times, these dreams have triggered me once I wake up to self harm. Its honestly getting out of hand and I don't know what to do.
I have told my friend about these nightmares, and he thinks I should talk to my friend Matthew, and I should see someone about getting help. But I'm scared of Matthew, and I don't want help because I feel like I'm having these nightmares for a reason. Even if its just to push me over the edge.
.......gah. This was just a rant. But I'm so lost
   
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Re: Something wrong with my mind?...or something? - January 31st 2013, 04:27 AM

It does sound like a disorder but because of your age they most likely wouldnt diagnose anything. The reason behind that has nothing to do with nothing is wrong but the fact your brain and everything isnt finished developing. I do understand the feeling you have towards feeling something is not right. I used to feel that way but they wanted to wait before diagnosing me. I do not see people but I hear things and have major paranoia problems. I would recommend you going to see a professional. They can help you control things and also better understand them. I got a little freaked out when I first started to open up about stuff and I heard things it could be but there are many things to help you if you are willing to be helped.


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Re: Something wrong with my mind?...or something? - February 11th 2013, 01:26 AM

I also recommend that you see a professional - and you might want to start off with a medical one (ex. your GP/primary physician). You referenced personality disorders, but there can be other causes for hallucinations. One would be a psychotic disorder, like schizophrenia, which has a neurological/biological component. Another would be a mood disorder with psychotic features. Yet another would be some kind of chemical imbalance in your brain. While it may be scary to think about seeing a professional (medical or psychological), thinking about dealing with this for the rest of your life, or thinking about missing something important (such as a brain tumor), is probably equally scary. I wouldn't wait on this, especially since there's self-harm tied into the episodes you're describing.






   
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Post Re: Something wrong with my mind?...or something? - February 11th 2013, 09:15 PM

Hii, I'm soo sorry that this is happening to you. something similar happens to mee with the seeing people and making people up in my mind that I see and making their names. But ours might be a little different from each others though.

Do you see them in the room with you? Or do you see them in your mind? I see them in my mind, but I know they are not real but its like I turn into them & talk to other ppl. It's like whatever I do in real life, I'm a different person, a person that's in my mind that I turn into, it's kinda confusing because it only happens when I'm alone.

About the cant be diagnosed thing, I went to my old therapist and my psychiatrist and no one would diagnose mee.

Srry if this didnt help and it seems like I'm ranting too, but basically what I'm trying to say is that I can relate to you. And I'm sure a lot of ppl can and you will be ok, just whenever you see things, try very hard to distract yourself from it and do something else.

Ik it's hard but I would try that and also, try to stay around someone you can trust so you would feel safer. And about the nightmares, I used to have very bad nightmares about scary thing and what I do when I woke up was distract myself and tell myself that it was just a nightmare or dream and that everything's ok, if that doesn't work, go tell someone you trust and talk to them about it.

Sryy for making this so long, lol. But I really hope this helps.
   
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Re: Something wrong with my mind?...or something? - February 11th 2013, 09:45 PM

I Know how you feel with the nightmares.
I get nightmares about satan and his demons.
I'm from a strict christian family so they think its actually satan trying to contact me.
He keeps offering me ......something. But the sacrifice is too big.
I'm sorry that this is no help, its just your post made me confident enough to share.


.....“You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself.”.....
   
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Re: Something wrong with my mind?...or something? - February 12th 2013, 03:15 PM

I wanted to come back and remind you that if the list of things scares you or anything do not worry. I know there are actual lots of reasons behind things like that. I feel sometimes we have to kind of let you know some of the extremes to go check everything out.

I was told hearing things and seeing things can be from health issues rather than mental health and so on. So as PSY mentioned going to see someone like a doctor is good. If you are scared and go to counseling or anything mention the stuff and maybe mention that you would like to investigate things more to find the root of the problem. I hope I things get better for you. Once you know the cause and how to deal with it, it can become so much easier to deal with. I had issues at first with the thought of something it wrong with me but in the end it makes me understand why somethings are the way they are.


feel free to PM me...

Always keep a smile on your face and Lots of love in you heart! <3

Dont wear a mask and suffocate
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Earth without ART is just EH...
   
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Re: Something wrong with my mind?...or something? - February 19th 2013, 02:33 PM

Sincerely, I can relate to you and i think you will get fine. Im not a doctor so i cant diagnose you something certain and perfect, but i can give you some advise and tell you what I know, because i have plans to be a psychologyst as my career in the future and i have studied alot.
But first let me tell you my personal experience with youre same type of problem. Oftenly i have those same type of nigthmares . ived had suicida; nigthmares, nigthmares in which shadows appears in mirrors and attack me , dreams in which I try to see myself in mirrors and cant see my self. The mirror dreams became so scary for me i became in fear to actually see myself in mirrors in the morning when i woke up. I had dreams in whihc i hurted ffriends of mines or they hurted me. So i didnt want to be close to any of my friends. I was scared anything bad would happen.
Last night I was having nigthmares with prison and jail, and a long triggering dream which i kept having everythime i went to sleep back again.
And ived even had self harm dreams ...
I personnally think you shouldnt let the dreams get traumatic to you. Seek some proffesional help, try to settle down and do a relaxing activity before goign to sleep, somethign in which you wont be exposed to anything that may trigger. Depression or anxiety both can be causes of nightmares .
Maybe a traumatic experience ?
If you wake up with these fears and such , or even when youre awake you feel fear, try to breath in peacefully, and try to relax.
Think of more hapier things . or talk to someone about youre fears. If you dont speak to someone you will keep those fears inside you and may hurt yourself even more.
If you wake up at ngith scared i sugest you relax and try to find something to feel better. Self harm doesnt tend to be the answer.
I think i know how it feels, when my GF died, i became oftenly guetting these nigthmares, and even when i woke up i didnt know if i was living a nigthmare. Dont allow it to make you fearfull. You are stronger than fear and always tell yourself that.

If you feel the need to talk to someone , im always here for you to PM

I hope you feel better

- Cristian
   
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Re: Something wrong with my mind?...or something? - February 26th 2013, 01:46 AM

thank you guys.... this helps a lot
   
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