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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
LonelyRazor Offline
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I need advice - March 4th 2019, 03:23 AM

last year my mother cheated on my dad and then they got a divorce which sucks but what also made it worse is the same time he found out about the divorce he found out he had cancer. My mom before she left kept telling us that my dad was doing illegal drugs (Which he wasn't he even had the VA send blood work to show her) and told the kids and made them think he was on them. Then she left and took my siblings I decided to stay behind with my dad because the whole thing was FUBAR.

She left us with a stack of unpaid bills because basically my dad would work his ass off and she would use the money he made to pay for the bills. But unknown to us she would pay the bare amount and take the rest for her. Then we got evicted from our house last month and had to stay at a friends for a while.

Now heres what I need advice for I just had to give you some background so you could understand some what of whats going on. Now with my depression and other issues it's been hard for me and since my dad is sick as hell. Throwing up constantly I would have to stay home from school and help out around the house. But the school is basically sayings it's not a reason to stay out of school and I have to retake my entire semester in school if I don't remake days.

Now Im honestly at wits end at this point. I need some sort of medical leave or something so my grades don't suffer and I need to get help for my mental health. Only reason I'm still living is because of my dad. Hes just had bad stuff thrown at him all year and last year and I don't want to just off my self and leave him to fend for himself.

I want to help him but I can't help him with out figuring out a plan to help my self some what. So, please any advice is welcomed at this point.

Thank you for reading my post I have no clue if this is the right section so sorry if it is. Just need advice real bad. I appreciate all the help
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Celyn Offline
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Re: I need advice - March 6th 2019, 07:16 PM

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad's cancer. It must've been really difficult for you all especially with the divorce, leftover bills and being evicted. It's very understandable that it would take a toll on your mental health more so when your dad is really unwell.

I'm also sorry to hear that the school is being less than sympathetic to you. Is your dad in a position to speak with the school? He might be able to back you up and explain more about the situation. While you might not be able to have time off as such (though you could try to get the school to allow you to complete your work at home if it's easier, but it's not guaranteed), you may be able to have extended deadlines, catch up classes during lunch or after school etc.

Also, do you know if your school has a counsellor you can talk to? It would be great if you could talk to them about your mental health as well as everything with your dad. If not, you might want to see if you can talk to your doctor for a referral for counselling. You might also want to look into whether you have social services or similar in your area. They might be able to offer your dad practical support and there might be support for you too such as young carers or young caregiver groups.

As difficult as it is looking after your dad, try to make sure you are looking after yourself too

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