Possible BPD symptoms...

[thezomtord]

I get downvoted to hell if I say this on Reddit and stuff, but I've always had a problem with relationships, maybe it's my autism, maybe not, who knows? But I've always been too "intense" and called crazy or yandere. I'm only 15 years old. I need to discuss with a professional, but here are some things I wrote.

"I'm gonna get professional help and find out what's wrong. It'll be hard though since I have autism and I'm a teen and I heard they don't diagnose autistic teens but a person who hates me said that so IDK if I can accept his comments as fact or not, we used to be friends until he started hurting me and being rude.

Anyway, IDK what it could be but I do have problems. If you come here to damage my self-esteem, please don't, but you can share your experiences. I already acknowledge I'm a bad person.

I do respect her boundaries, but I also feel like I can't form a connection with her. She says we're friends, but people have said she wants nothing to do with me and that she's "just being nice", especially since she's an art account who doesn't want to look bad for her fans or whatever. IDK how true that is, but she never knows what to say when I talk to her, but then again she wants me to make art for her, so that means she doesn't hate me, right?

I feel like a disgusting creep like I've been called my whole life by people for being too intense and clingy. I'm insanely obsessive, no joke. And at first, I felt rejected and decided I wouldn't talk to her, but I've calmed down and I'm too attached to cut contact entirely. She said I could message her but not every day and that she'd tell me if she didn't wanna talk.

I know it's not her fault, probably not mine, maybe it is, so why do I feel so bad?? Or maybe, why DID I since I'm better now? We're friends regardless, right? She didn't just outright ghost me and call me names."

Why do I both posting on Reddit anymore? No one interacts and I just get downvoted and whatnot. Not even people with the disorder I think I have bother to sympathize and share their story...

[Dude111]

Welcome to the site my friend!


Are you wanting a good relationship now?

If you really want one,you can make it happen


Im sorry your going thru all this,,

[thezomtord]

Thank you!!!! It's okkkk

[Face Up.]

I think what you wrote sounds great! Are you planning on giving that to someone (such as a teacher or guardian) in order to ask for some help? Having some examples of what you mean will make it easier to treat you, whether it turns out to be BPD or not. I don't think you're a disgusting creep though! I feel like creeps don't care as much about BEING a creep, if that makes sense. Keep a log of everything you're experiencing and the circumstances around it happening. It can help to have a log.

[Proud90sKid]

Reddit is full of virtue signallers and an echo chamber for people
who have certain beliefs.... I actually intentionally post in a way that maximizes downvotes now.

Reddit went through a period of hyper-censorship during COVID and while there has been some recovery, it has been incomplete

Im not a Republican, but cancel culture was the dumbest things the Democrats ever did by a wide margin. I can tell you that when it was in full force...I was the least sympathetic to liberal ideals. I have actually become more liberal as cancel culture declined. It was too aggressive. Reddit attempted it (ie. was auto banned from a lot of subs by bots just for commenting in r/lockdownskeptism...someone actually took free time out of their day to design a bot that went through post history to see if you EVER commented in that sub... wasnt aware covid was apparently able to infect remotely through a computer screen until then (sarcasm))

I dont like Republicans, but boy, I will have a difficult time forgiving the opposite party for cancel culture and for pushing the idea that as a white male, I should essentially be disenfranchised. A public apology for cancel culture, MeToo (because women DO sometimes lie to frame people), and covid hypocrisy would go a LONG way though.

Btw, I am permanently banned from reddit for voicing my opinion.