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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
LostHERmind Offline
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I Don't Know what actions I should take... - November 5th 2009, 09:21 PM

I think I should get help- but I don't know how to go about it.
I feel like I should be institutionalized, to be honest. My imagination is out of control- its terrifying and I'm scared over the most irrational things. I'm scared of mirrors and my shower because of the things I see in my head. They are NOT hallucinations- but they can come pretty close- like so vivid its almost seen... I'm falling apart because of school stress- which is making it worse. So not only am I at home terrified of silence but I'm sobbing because I wont be able to graduate unless I can get brave enough to actually move out of my safe spaces. I'm also reading a book in English that is exaggerating my strangeness.
The reason I mentioned getting institutionalized is because it was an option when I was younger. I had some issues- I used to self harm by biting and pinching. I havent really done it since I was almost sent, but I fear I may be coming close, I like to get cold to the point of pain or nearly there when I'm upset.

Basically- I think I should do something about it- I can't keep doing this. I know it isnt the worst- but I personally can't stand it anymore.
How do I go about finding a professional who can help me without getting family involved? Or do I have to wait another 6 months or so (I'll be a legal adult then) before I can do that? I really dont want to worry my mom, or anyone. I want to do this as quietly as I can... The sooner the better- being 17 and having to sleep with lights on and call out for my mom at 3 am is embarrasing- but I can't help it...
   
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Re: I Don't Know what actions I should take... - November 5th 2009, 09:23 PM

Hi. I'm sorry you are dealing with this. I can relate on some stuff. Is there a psychologist or counselor at school you can talk to? I know at my school they don't have to get parents involved unless you are going to hurt yourself or something else serious. Please PM me if you want to talk.
   
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Re: I Don't Know what actions I should take... - November 5th 2009, 09:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ghostoverground View Post
Hi. I'm sorry you are dealing with this. I can relate on some stuff. Is there a psychologist or counselor at school you can talk to? I know at my school they don't have to get parents involved unless you are going to hurt yourself or something else serious. Please PM me if you want to talk.
There are normal councelors, but I don't like them... They're... weird. I actually got really nervous and depressed by them in the past- today was the first time I didnt cry in a meeting witht hem (about how im failing a class HARD- I know why though so it was pretty pointless) They call home too- about everything. >:
I might see though, if they can do something.
   
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Re: I Don't Know what actions I should take... - November 5th 2009, 10:04 PM

Hey there,
Im sorry to hear you are feeling this way, i know how hard it must be for you.
In the past and right now, im going through the whole getting help without the 'rents finding out.
Where i live, if you are sixteen or over, you can go into adult services by being referred by your GP without you parents knowing, but they may also want you to go to CAMHS or another children and adolsecent service, in which case your parents will have to know. How'ever, you could just see your GP for a chat on things but ask for the confidentality rules before hand to be safe. Also, if you are at school or college, maybe there is a nurse or a councillor there who you could talk to. Ask the confidentality rules before hand to.
How'ever, if you cant find something which your parents wont find anything out, maybe you need to take a step back, and look at the situation. In rreality, can you carry on this way and risk the chanced of turning to self harm etc again? Or are you willing to take the risk of it happening? This is grand coming from me people may say, but i am really hoping to face my fears and see someone tomorrow at school, and i think you should try do the same, what ever the out come of people fidning out are.
In the end, you are the one that matters. Take risks and chances, and have hope and faith for yourself. Be who you want to be for you. Do want you want to do, what you need to do for you... Cause its all about you.
Take care, and i wish you the best.
Hope everything goes okay.
Always here :]

Jess x


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Re: I Don't Know what actions I should take... - November 5th 2009, 10:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jezzka View Post
Hey there,
Im sorry to hear you are feeling this way, i know how hard it must be for you.
In the past and right now, im going through the whole getting help without the 'rents finding out.
Where i live, if you are sixteen or over, you can go into adult services by being referred by your GP without you parents knowing, but they may also want you to go to CAMHS or another children and adolsecent service, in which case your parents will have to know. How'ever, you could just see your GP for a chat on things but ask for the confidentality rules before hand to be safe. Also, if you are at school or college, maybe there is a nurse or a councillor there who you could talk to. Ask the confidentality rules before hand to.
How'ever, if you cant find something which your parents wont find anything out, maybe you need to take a step back, and look at the situation. In rreality, can you carry on this way and risk the chanced of turning to self harm etc again? Or are you willing to take the risk of it happening? This is grand coming from me people may say, but i am really hoping to face my fears and see someone tomorrow at school, and i think you should try do the same, what ever the out come of people fidning out are.
In the end, you are the one that matters. Take risks and chances, and have hope and faith for yourself. Be who you want to be for you. Do want you want to do, what you need to do for you... Cause its all about you.
Take care, and i wish you the best.
Hope everything goes okay.
Always here :]

Jess x
Jess is right... a few years ago the last thing I wanted was for my parents to find out how miserable and messed up I was.. but it turned out okay because now I am getting help. I know it sucks when you don't want to talk to your parents about stuff.. it's still like that for me.. but it's worth it because I have my therapist now.
Not saying that you have to right out tell them. See if there is someone at school you can talk to-- a counselor.. although if the counselors at your school are anything like the ones at mine I see why you don't want to talk to them. double check that there isn't a social worker or something. Otherwise maybe a teacher you trust? In my opinion it's worth the risk of parents finding out if you get to talk to someone.
   
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LostHERmind Offline
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Re: I Don't Know what actions I should take... - November 6th 2009, 12:19 AM

Good points... I'll try that- I can actually hop on a bus after school and go to the towns hospital if I feel I need to that badly...
I can't talk to my parents when I'm stressed and weird like this. Mid-terms came home today and I just couldn't deal- now I feel hyper-sensitive to some stuff Stress sucks~
they were helpful- thanks ^^ I'll look around for that stuff too
   
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