I'm getting more and more paranoid :/

[Rainbow Dash]

I'm terrified of dying, I understand most people are but I think I think about death a lot more than other people. I sometimes cry myself to sleep at night just thinking of it. I sometimes think I wish I was never born just so I wouldn't have to die (which sounds ridiculous I know) I don't know what I'm scared of exactly, just the unknown.

I'm always paranoid I have things wrong with me which could result in me dying. I've felt like this since I was a child but I've gotten a lot worse. I get paranoid over stupid things like mouth ulcers that last too long :/ I've also got a cyst near my neck and I'm paranoid it may be something else :/ My doctor even told me it just feels like fluid, I just don't really trust him. I nearly fainted yesterday and now I'm scared stiff it may be something serious.

I'm also paranoid things will happen to my family. If my sister is something like 20 minutes late from work I think something has happened, which is stupid as she only works a few streets away :/

Gah >___< Realistically I know me and my family are more than likely fine but I can't get all these "What if?"s out of my mind :/

[Stephanie]

Hey there Ceilidh,

I'm sorry that you're struggling with this paranoia, it can be very difficult coping with those thoughts.

It's natural to have a fear of the unknown and almost everyone shares this fear to a certain extent, however, when it gets to the point where you can't push the thoughts out of your mind, it's usually a good idea to talk to someone about how you're feeling and what you're thinking about. Important points are to try and not think the worse about things and to try and think rationally about your thoughts.

If this has gotten worse recently then this anxiety could actually be provoked by your medication, it's not unusual. I would suggest that you talk to a professional about these thoughts. A talking therapy such as CBT might be suggested and could possibly help with this situation.

Take care.

[Rainbow Dash]

If I tell my family they just make fun of me and call me a hypochondriac :/ my friends just tell me to chill. I was thinking the same thing about the medication, like I said I've always been like this but it has gotten worse I'm thinking of getting therapy soon anyway, I may ask my doctor about this thanks <3