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Unhappy am i good at anything??? - August 9th 2010, 10:29 PM

Alright. i'm not sure if this is the right place to put this but...here goes nothing. There are a few things i'm struggling with right now...i can pretty much say that all of these things have to do with jealousy or insecurity. so...i get jealous of people a lot because...no matter what i do or how good i am at something it seems like someone else is always better. i'm jealous of my friends i'm jealous of people in my classes at school. and after the jealousy always comes insecurity. i feel like i can't do anything well and...nobody ever recognizes my talents. like...i can sing and i love to do it but...one of my friends can draw really well and people are always complimenting her so i feel like my talent is insignificant. maybe it's because she has something to show for it and...i can't go around you know...singing all the time?? and i feel like i could be so much better at everything i do but...i'm so insecure about myself that i can't try. it's like i always have a wall up. i'm sure there's a reason for this but...i can't figure what it is so i have no idea how to fix it! any advice or...similar situations that might help??
   
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Re: am i good at anything??? - August 11th 2010, 08:46 AM

Do you get anxiety in general social situations, or just anxious about talents and stuff. Keep in mind that having a cool talent doesn't really matter, just being a good person/friend is all i would look for in a person. I would call that a talent in itself. If you really want a talent i recommend learning an instrument like piano, it's extremely fun and cathartic


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Re: am i good at anything??? - August 11th 2010, 11:55 PM

yes i do...i get anxious about the simplest things.

and i'm a little out of practice but...i can play the piano. i wish i could get back into it!! but my piano is so out of tune
   
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Re: am i good at anything??? - August 12th 2010, 12:19 AM

Hey,

I definitely know what it's like to struggle with insecurity. It's something I have an extremely hard time with myself. Unfortunately I haven't find a way to get over it completely yet, it's something that I've dealt with pretty much my whole life. But one thing I have learned is that comparing yourself to others will only make things worse.

I like to write, and at the same time I really like to read. Sometimes I can't help but think to myself "there's no way I'll ever write as good as my favorite authors, or even half the people my age. Compares to so many people, I am absolutely terrible." But just because there may be people out there better than me doesn't mean I'm not talented.

If you're passionate about something, if you want to be good at something, and don't feel you're as good at it as you could be, use that disappointment you feel when you doubt your abilities as in inspiration to improve. For example, sometimes I'll think: I'm not as good of a writer as some of my favorite authors and I never will be. Instead, I should think: I'm not as good of a writer as my favorite authors, but they've taken writing courses and have been writing for years. I'm only fourteen, and I have little experience compared to them. I can always improve.

We're all born with a gift. We're not born better at that gift than anyone else; it's up to us to take that gift and to improve it the best that we can. It's not about being the absolute best at something, it's about trying your best. If you know deep down that you are trying your best, you won't compare yourself to others, because you will be happy with who you are and what you can do.

Insecurity is a battle, but you're definitely not the only one who's fighting it. I struggle with it every day too, so just know that you're not alone.

You're more than welcome to PM me anytime.





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