Cannot put a thumb on my problem.

[ac2]

It all began almost a year ago, when I was drafted into the army (its compulsory for all males in my country to enlist). I led a pretty decent, if not somewhat happy life prior to being drafted. I had a decent number of friends, a job, enough money to get by, exercised everyday and I even had a job which was in line with my passion; photography.
Then as I was in the army going through my training, I started meeting up with friends less and less often. That was still pretty normal since we only get saturdays off in the army.
But as time went by, I started losing contact with a pretty good number of my friends. Some went to college, some went on some other unit in the army, while other just simply drifted.
Somewhere along the way, I found myself losing a great deal of interest in photography. I stopped using my camera to take pictures. I stopped reading my cinematography magazines, I even stopped watching the occasional movies; all I did was sit at home staring at the facebook page for hours, or sleep till I woke up.
I get along perfectly fine with the guys in the army, infact, I'm pretty good friends with some of them. Its just that they all have their own lives - girlfriends, old friends etc, whenever it hits the weekend especially since its so precious.
Now before you tell me to get up and go outside I have to say; I did. I went out, bought groceries, went to town, walked around, but still I found myself going through the same vicious cycle again. I have tried asking some of my long lost friends out again, but the fact that I only have my saturday nights out, as well as the fact that I havent spoken to most of them in ages, makes it extremely hard to arrange any meeting. I feel so desperate that I even thought of speaking to some random strangers off the street - although I don't think I'm crazy enough. Not yet at least.
These days, I find myself just putting on an ipod, sitting outside, and smoking cigarette after cigarette, hoping and waiting that something would happen, or someone would give me call or text me on my cell phone to ask me out. I can't put a thumb on my problem, is it loneliness? Am I sinking into depression? Is it stress? Am I suffering from some sort of psychological problem? Its getting really frustrating; especially the fact that I don't have much of a choice but to stick with it for the next two years in the army.

[Thirteen]

Its most likely loneliness, and the fact that the change is upsetting you. Or at least, thats how it seems. I have a feeling that if you were able to contact your old friends, you'd bounce back to being perfectly happy.

Maybe find a better way to contact them all, like writing an e-mail, making a phone call or something. Texts and such are rather informal.

Good luck.