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How to not feel guilty? - September 24th 2010, 07:21 PM

To cut an extremely long story short, how do you guys avoid feeling so guilty about something you know you shouldn't feel guilty for?
   
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Re: How to not feel guilty? - September 24th 2010, 08:20 PM

It really does depend on the situation. Let's say that I accidentally said something mean to someone, which I did a while back. I remembered what I said and texted the person late at night just to clarify that I didn't mean to hurt their feelings. That way I didn't have to feel guilty because I addressed it. When you ignore your feelings then It usually makes it worse. Even if you can't fix what you've done, try and talk to yourself. " I know I did something that I know was wrong, but now that I know It's not okay I'm not going to do it anymore. What's done is done."


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Re: How to not feel guilty? - September 25th 2010, 08:04 PM

Well, what happened was my dad left town to go give a speech at a conference, and I'm an only child. He asked if I wanted to go - and I seriously didn't, he kept saying stuff like "you can record it and send it to your mom", etc etc. I ended up not going because he gave me the option to, and I didn't want to.

Now he keeps making me feel guilty for not going.
   
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Re: How to not feel guilty? - September 28th 2010, 07:06 AM

Your dad can't make you feel guilty. Your feelings come from within, and they are telling you something.

Maybe in this instance they are telling you that going would have meant a lot to your dad, and he would have liked you to have recorded the speech and sent it to your mum.

Ultimately there is a failure in communication. Trying looking up communication on the Reach Out website, (I can't link to it yet because I haven't made ten posts). There is a really great step by step process there for handling difficult conversations with people that you care about.
   
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Re: How to not feel guilty? - September 28th 2010, 07:30 PM

interesting... just tell him how you truly felt about going with him, i doubt he is going to make you feel guilty for being honest. i dunno how you feel about him at all, if your close with him or not, so i can't predict further. include anything in the answer you need him to know, get it off your chest. he deserves to know, he's your father after all. hope he will understand because i see no other way to let it out, feelings, including guilt.

btw, i clicked the link thinking this is a general topic.

edit: maybe he's making you feel guilty because he feels a little hurt by your rejection. yup, it's selfish, but he wanted you to come, i think.
like opal said above, you can even develop this guilt yourself, not him putting in the guilt for you.
you may feel sorry for the decision.


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