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Mental Health Use this forum to share your mental health concerns and to seek advice.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Another Zombie Offline
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Name: Emile
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Am I mentally insane or something? - April 12th 2011, 07:25 PM

Okay, I am really sorry. I feel kinda selfish for asking and not giving, and I apologize dearly for that. I just needed a place to ask this out loud once and for all.

I have always been an original individual. I never hang out with a specific group of people, don't care if I'm alone or not, don't care what others think of me, all that. I say what I say when I want to say it and I say it like it should be said.

Now, I've been thinking that there may be something wrong with me for a long while now. I don't know if it's just puberty, but I would like to ask you guys and gals.

There are many stuff that make me think that I have problems. I do. I do have problems. But I just want to know what the cause is.

I have suicide thoughts. I don't care about dying in the least. I have horrible views on life. I am paranoid. I have extreme mood swings almost every week. I can't sleep at night.

Now, those are just some stuff that I think are supposed to be normal. But those things seem to turn minor in comparison.

I have tried to strangle me dog. He's a little pup. I saw him near one night while alone. I saw him looking innocently at me. I grabbed his neck. I pressed hard. I held on and on and pressed harder and harder till he fainted. He survived. I still have vivid memories of how happy I felt doing it. If I didn't hesitate, the dog would be dead.

I hallucinate. I see people around who disappear into thin air. I hear sounds coming from nowhere.

I burn myself. I put my arms under scolding hot warm water and let it drop on them. I love the pain.

I think of how I will kill people before thinking of how to befriend them. I think this has something to do with paranoia, but I feel it's unnatural do imagine pushing people off high buildings and stabbing them with a lust.

I don't know what to do anymore. I feel depressed and suicidal and insane; all melded into one. My parents don't know and may not believe me.

Please don't see me as selfish, though I feel that way.

Thank you.
   
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Re: Am I mentally insane or something? - April 12th 2011, 08:03 PM

Hello Emile,

Firstly welcome to teenhelp. If you ever need anything just feel free to ask. I am sure you will love this site and find it very helpful.

I am sorry to hear that things are so hard right now. You are NOT selfish i can assure you of that. We all need help at times and this is ok. It is only by helping ourselves that we can truely help others at times.

Been an individual is a good thing and it is good that you are independant. However, we all need someone at times and we all need people. There is nothing wrong with that. Just as there is nothing wrong with liking spending time on your own.

It doesn't sound like it is just punerty to me. I would suggest that the best thing that you can do is tell an adult you trust. Whether it is a teacher, a family member, a family friend, a coach. They can help you. If you feel that you can't say it. Then write it down or just show them what you have written here. They will be able to help you and give you the support you need and they will believe you.

Also i would advise you to seek proffesional advise as then you will be able to understand if you do have a problem and be able to try and solve that in the best way. Suicide is not the answer sweetie and things are hard but they will get better.

Take care <3


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Another Zombie Offline
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Re: Am I mentally insane or something? - April 13th 2011, 01:04 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by emzyquack View Post
Hello Emile,

Firstly welcome to teenhelp. If you ever need anything just feel free to ask. I am sure you will love this site and find it very helpful.

I am sorry to hear that things are so hard right now. You are NOT selfish i can assure you of that. We all need help at times and this is ok. It is only by helping ourselves that we can truely help others at times.

Been an individual is a good thing and it is good that you are independant. However, we all need someone at times and we all need people. There is nothing wrong with that. Just as there is nothing wrong with liking spending time on your own.

It doesn't sound like it is just punerty to me. I would suggest that the best thing that you can do is tell an adult you trust. Whether it is a teacher, a family member, a family friend, a coach. They can help you. If you feel that you can't say it. Then write it down or just show them what you have written here. They will be able to help you and give you the support you need and they will believe you.

Also i would advise you to seek proffesional advise as then you will be able to understand if you do have a problem and be able to try and solve that in the best way. Suicide is not the answer sweetie and things are hard but they will get better.

Take care <3
You don't have a clue how much better I feel after reading that. I thank you very much emzy, you truly gave me a nice warm piece of advice.

Also, thank you for not calling me anything. I just wanted to know if it's normal for someone at my age and this is the first time getting it out there.

Have a nice day further, and thanks for your epic help.
   
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