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Mental Health Use this forum to share your mental health concerns and to seek advice.

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I have a phobia of being alone - April 13th 2011, 12:48 AM

The title explains it all... I can't be alone. Basically, all my life I've had a girlfriend. I'm 20 and I dont have a job or anything. The girl I'm with I don't really want to be with... I have a chance to move and get a nice job and things but I feel I can't without a girl going with me or someone I know.. I just feel like I'll be depressed if I go up there without knowing anybody.. can anyone help?
   
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Re: I have a phobia of being alone - April 13th 2011, 03:56 AM

I'm pretty sure the only way to really deal with this, as it's affecting your life, is to go to a counselor. Find the right one, and you should be able to make a lot of progress with getting better.
   
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Re: I have a phobia of being alone - April 22nd 2011, 10:50 PM

Anyone else have anymore info?
   
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Re: I have a phobia of being alone - April 23rd 2011, 02:01 AM

First off, the title of this really caught my attention. I have the phobia of being alone too so I know how you feel. I can't stand, nor will I even tolerate being alone. I constantly must have someone with me, and if I'm alone for too long of a time I have panic attacks. I've never been alone for a full night before, not once in my 19 years, and just a few hours on my own is painful and frightening enough.

I wish I could help you, but I have no been able to get over this either. However, I have gotten better. The easiest way is to slowly stop. Treat it like an addiction to something. Stopping cold turkey is not going to work. Try to be alone for short periods of time and have them slowly start to increase when you are comfortable for that length of time. When you are alone try doing something you enjoy doing so you won't feel so bad. If you associate it being alone with something good, it could help over a period of time. This isn't something that is going to just go away, but it can get better.

Seeing a cousellor about it is also a good thing to do. They can help you determine why you feel this way if you don't already know and from then you can overcome the fear.

I don't have any actual info, I don't understand it much more than you, but a professional should explain it better. Everyone is the way they are for different reasons. My reason is probably different from yours and what works for me may not work for you.

Try what I suggested and maybe try to write down some other ideas you can come up with. Maybe you would feel better just knowing someone is in contact with you? Like when your alone would it help you to text someone so you know that they are there? Or do you need them to be there physically more than emotionally? Try to think about these things and from there you can up with a plan.

I hope this has helped. Hang in there!


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Re: I have a phobia of being alone - April 23rd 2011, 09:50 AM

i feel the same i dont even like walking around the house by myself, and always end up freaking my self out.
and i have always felt like i neaded to be loved by someone, it annoyys me like hell, i try my best at doing things by meyself.. i just feel like i cant cope with it at all.
i know my age is alot different and im alot younger but i never used to be like this but ever since i started hight school, iv felt depressed and alone all the time even in a crowded room.

im sorry i didnt give any help. just felt i should share my story


"Life isn't about how popular you are... What girl or boy you are dating or who you know. Life is about always being true to who you are or what you believe in. Never let anyone convince you that their way is better than your way. In the end all we have is our hearts... and our minds. This is the reason why we sing... this is the reason why we cry... this is why we live."

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Re: I have a phobia of being alone - April 23rd 2011, 10:04 AM

Well from what I can see, if you do move you'll have a chance to meet new people, and to make new friends within a job. Also if you don't really want to be with the girl you're with at the minute, you may find someone else if you do move. Just from one point of view.
   
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