Chemical Imbalance?

[Climber]

I didn't know whether I should post this in the depression or mental health sections.

So yeah. My depression seems to always comes back. It's almost like cycles - sometimes something will trigger me and I'll be 'down' for a few days, other times it just comes out of no where. Sometimes I go through something terrible and I'm fine, other times I'm not.

'Cause of the attention whore I am, I have to talk to people online about it. Either people I've met, or ones on random chat sites. Getting reassurance and talking about things usually makes me feel better, so I guess its a temporary fix - but temporary is all it is. The only way I can describe it is like I'm running from something but I can never escape it. This 'trapped' feeling is horrible, and it only brings back my suicidal thoughts. I'm fairly sure it's not my mindset, although I am usually depressed about the same things, my horrible anxiety, possible panic attacks, constant lack of energy, self hatred, traumatic experiences in my past.

So I was talking to someone about anxiety and depression, and they mentioned they're now taking medication for it, and they're the happiest they've ever been. They went from being extremely introverted to very extroverted. I guess it stuck with me, because I can't stop thinking about how I want to get better like that. I guess my question is, do I have some sort of chemical imbalance? My depression always seems to come back. No matter how hard I try to 'put myself out there' in the world, my anxiety doesn't get any better. Feels like raking leaves in the wind I guess. If I was to see a doctor, take medication and start to feel better, the thing I'm pretty sure I would curse myself out the most for, is "why didn't you do this sooner".

My parents are fairly against the whole 'medicating any sort of illness' thing. Especially with all of those commercials here about depression medication causing suicidal side effects, so I've refrained from discussing it with them.

[Fairy Poppins]

I used to believe that I was suffering from a chemical imbalance, because that's what the psychiatrist said when she prescribed me the pills for my clinical depression.

However, I read a book once which made me change my mind. It basically said that this so-called chemical imbalance cannot be (and is not) proven in individual cases. After all, it's not like they extract the chemicals from your brain and examine them before they come to this conclusion. It's just a case of, "Oh, you're dealing with long-term depression? You must have a chemical imbalance."

The truth is, or was for me anyway, that the real reason that my depression wasn't going away was because I wasn't dealing with the cause of it effectively. Or rather, I had left the cause untreated for so long that my brain had got stuck in a rut. Once I finally managed to cure myself of OCD and the resulting anxiety and avoidance of situations, I started to feel better (more "free" anyway). However, by this point I had failed college, was in a job I hated and being abused my my (now ex) boyfriend. So, understandably, I still felt depressed.

A few years later I'm now back in college studying a different course and am in a stable, loving relationship. Therefore I don't feel depressed and am actually in the process of being weaned off of my anti-depressants.

I'm not saying that the anti-depressants haven't helped me; they've been a valuable tool for helping me to feel well again. However, I believe I needed the surge of Serotonin not because I had a chemical imbalance, but because I had been feeling depressed for so many years that I needed something to give me a boost just to get me started on this journey.

Therefore, my advice to you is to reconsider why it is you are feeling depressed. You said, "sometimes something will trigger me and I'll be 'down' for a few days", which is completely normal, especially for teenagers/young adults. Feeling sad/low/etc is expected if something has happened to upset you.

You then said that, "other times it just comes out of no where". Believe it or not, this is also completely normal. Sometimes people have days/episodes where they just feel depressed for no reason, but it passes and then they feel content/happy again.

In conclusion, even if it were possible to have a chemical imbalance, it doesn't seem likely that you have one, because your depression is not constant and there are usually reasons for why you feel this way.

However, if you would like not to feel depressed at all, or just want some support, it might be worth speaking to a counselor (perhaps at your school/college/uni if you are that age) so that you can get what is upsetting you off your chest. You could also post a thread on TeenHelp or a HelpLINK ticket.

I hope this helps.

Take care,

Jasmine. x

[OMFG!You'reActuallySmart!]

The chemical imbalance idea holds true but it's often presented incorrectly. Companies or wannabees state, "chemical imbalance" as buzz words. If you feel angry, happy, sad, tired, hungry, horny, etc..., there's a "chemical imbalance". The neurochemical systems in your nervous system do not act independently, so whenever someone says, "hey, you're depressed because of a chemical imbalance of serotonin", understand that statement is completely false. I don't mean to imply you're a cluster-fuck because even when 1 system is "imbalanced", it doesn't mean it's so out of line it needs immediate help, since the system still is regulating itself with all the other systems as well. It's not a black and white picture the buzz words of "chemical imbalance" paint it to be.

In no way is it possible for your serotonin system to be off-balance with everything else being "right". Also, the neurochemical systems aren't completely understood, especially of the serotonin system, as many parts of it are still mysterious. There are around 20 or so types of serotonin receptors, yet only a few are fairly well understood. Some of the others are mysterious, researchers found them but don't know what on Earth they do. Thus, for someone to say you have chemical imbalance, it assumes they know a) your current levels, b) the "correct" levels for the entire chemical system and c) the false notion chemical systems work independently.

When it comes to depression, psychotherapy is almost as effective as anti-depressants.

[Dr.Bobby]

Opinions vary. Here's mine, and as always, your mileage may vary.

People cannot diagnose you online, and surely the experiences of utter strangers cannot at all determine your outcome to meds. That said, what might be useful is the reality of hearing that improvement is possible with action on your part.

I'd take it a step at a time here, so the first step is to use your recognition of how unhappy you are (regardless what might be causing it), and your new found awareness that there's stuff out there that might help you, and go talk with your folks about how unhappy you've been and how it's been effecting you and interfering. Be specific and go into detail so they get a clear picture and realize they need to help you. I bet you haven't done that. And don't worry about them being anti meds, you're not seeking that b/c it hasn't been determined that's what's called for. Right now, you want to alert them to something they might not appreciate is going on with their child, and that needs attention.

The goal here is to get to someone who can properly assess your unhappiness and devise a treatment (be it meds or therapy or a combo) that addresses your specific situation and needs.

Also, although waiting and ruminating has prevented you from getting to a doc, the point is that it's never too late. Unless you now use all this awareness and continue to do nothing.

[Climber]

No, you're right, I haven't brought it up with my parents at all. I guess I have a pride/ extreme embarrassment problem discussing it with people I know. Same reason why someone is more open about personal matters online than in real life I guess? Subtly bringing up how I'm depressed, and have bad anxiety is usually dismissed as laziness, because I'm not active enough, inside all day, etc. I don't like being insulted, so I've basically given up on trying to explain it to my parents.

Thanks though.

[Ghost On The Highway]

I believe the hype. But not entirely.

I've had depression, horrible anxiety, and identity crises since my "alcoholic" days left me a shell of a man back in 2009. I've taken Zoloft, Prozac, Wellbutrin (the shitty generic), Seroquel, Ativan, Xanax, Klonopin, Lamictal, Effexor and a few others since then. Effexor + Lamictal seems to work the best for me, YMMV. I'm on a moderate dose, 150mg E and 100mg L. My concentration has improved (still not "normal"), though my memory is getting worse. My moods are more stable, and I'm generally less prone to rage, crying, insomnia, suicidal thoughts, etc.

BUT...It's quite expensive without insurance and causes DEFINITE PHYSICAL AND MENTAL WITHDRAWAL SYMPTOMS. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, even my psychiatrist agrees. I skipped two doses of effexor and was vomiting constantly, my skin felt like rubber, my head was spinning, seeing spots, etc. I also had suicidal thoughts, intensely religious heaven/hell thoughts, and couldn't sleep. Off Lamictal I felt energized physically but dull mentally. I noticed a "split" in my rational and emotional halves and felt literally inhuman. It's a feeling I believe I am unique in experiencing.

Overall I'd say it's helped. We shall see come winter, and I'm doing everything I can to stay healthy: Omega 3's, exercise, vitamins, healthful eating, light box therapy, etc.

If there is a definite emotional cause you can attribute your depression to, it's probably not a "chemical imbalance."

Also, serotonin is not the only neurotransmitter in the brain . Norepinephrine, dopamine, acetylcholine and others all play a major role in the way we feel and think. SSRI's work for some, SNRI's for others, DNRI's, Lithium, etc. the list goes on.

PM me if you have questions.