Visions.

[CitizenErased]

I've been struggling with something for a while which I haven't posted about. I always thought it would fade. Almost every day, I get strong visions of me violently killing my parents. I love my parents to pieces, and it would kill me to see them suffer. And I know we have our arguments and disagreements and things, but I would never hurt them. It's not really a hallucination either, because I know it's not real.

I'll just be sitting in class, quietly reflecting on my day, then suddenly I'll see my Dad dying, then I see I killed him. This tears me apart completely, because I break down every time. They've done so much for me. It hurts just to think about it.

Does anyone have any similar experiences or advice on how to control/manage these things?

[PSY]

I've dealt with recurring, unwanted mental images as well. I cannot diagnose you, but this sounds like something along the lines of OCD (with just the obsessive thoughts, not the compulsive behaviors). If these visions are strongly affecting you, I would consider seeing someone who specializes in anxiety disorders/OCD.

I've never actually seen someone for this, because the visions only occur in certain situations (when I'm home alone at night). When those situations are completely unavoidable, I do things to distract myself, like pray or call my boyfriend. I also tell myself, over and over again, that the visions aren't real, the scenario isn't going to happen, that I'm okay/safe/etc. You can try doing that as well. =)