will i feel better?

[Vons]

I'm in a strange place

During the summer, i got fixed on writing a story. For that, i had to explore my darker side and literary strengthen. I haven't finished it.
Then high school started. It was hard, but i had a good start. Even though people liked me, i was lonely and miserable. Eventually, i gave in to just being present before actually doing something. I started thinking about antidepressants. My parents were worried.
I spent the winter holidays lying in bed. Then i decied to listen to my mum and go to a psychiatrist. She suggested it because she is one and claims she prescribed the pills to people who hadn't even felt as bad as me. But i didn't wanna use her.
I told that men all about the women i was writing about, and what i think happens in my life because of that. For an exampe, if i haven't thought about her so much, i would not have needed to go out for so many walks. Because i did, i almost got raped. I don't think it's a simple coincidence. In the story, she's a rape victim.
He said i had a too intense feel of everyday things and that we will meet again in two weeks. I try to do better.
Nothing is happening. I started drinking and smoking. I can't write about her. I sit in front of my computer and eat most of the time because i need to fill this huge hole in me. I can't study. I'm afraid of trying.
I thought i was in love a few months back. I haven't talked to the guy once. Now it's just a sickening feeling every time i see him. I can't get near him. At some point, every time i thought about him i remember that other guy's tongue down my throat. I don't know how much that affects me.
I'm wasting my time. I know from experience it doesn't get better. I feel like i'm drowning.
Will the pills make me feel any better? Safe?

I'm sorry about the spelling

[Amberpamber]

If they were prescribed to you then its probably best that you take them. They wouldn't have been prescribed to you if they weren't needed. I'd give it time to work though and I'm sure you'l start feeling better.

[Vons]

sure, but what's going to change?

[PSY]

Hello, Marija (I love your name!).

Will you feel better, and will anything change? The answer is "yes" for many people. It's not simply a matter of taking anti-depressants, though. Generally, the most effective form of treatment is a combination of anti-depressants AND regular therapy. The anti-depressants can be used to treat chemical imbalances, but the medication alone won't help you cope with life's problems. The anti-depressants just help "prepare" you for therapy... they put you in a mindset where you can absorb what the therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist is telling you, and with that knowledge, you can begin to make changes to your life.

Change does not occur overnight, and change will not take place if you refuse to participate in your own recovery. It's natural to have doubts, and I wouldn't expect you to blindly put your trust in a psychological professional after one session. Over time, though, I'm hoping you will suspend those doubts and slowly begin to try some of the techniques you'll be learning in therapy. You made need to see a different psychological professional at some point, should this current one prove to be ineffective. You may need to change your medication at some point, should it prove to be ineffective. You may need to try a combination of medication (MANY people have to try several different medications over the course of their lives). Ultimately, the amount of change you will achieve is going to depend on how committed you are to your own recovery. There is a lot that your family members, friends, and psychological professionals can do to support you - but at the end of the day, it all comes down to whether or not you're willing to fight for a happier and healthier life. It's hard work, and there will probably be setbacks from time to time. Mental illnesses do not have "cures"... they are lifelong illnesses. That does not mean you are "doomed" to a life of misery, though. There IS hope.