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Mental Health Use this forum to share your mental health concerns and to seek advice.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Angry i get so angry then sad - February 27th 2012, 09:41 AM

i dont no what genre this is under i really dont give a shit
i dont no why but for ages i just get so angry about stuff it could be little or even a big things but it seems like everyday it happens . im going ok then something happens and i get all this anger inside of me and i usually end up losing control and doing something wrong like breaking something , punching something, swearing or just saying what i think of them right to there face its like i dont think i just do and its scrwed me over so many times like with friends ,family , kids at school or just anyone basically
it also takes ages to go away like up to 4 or 3 hours to calm down then once i am calmed down i usually just get really sad and it makes me think of doing bad stuff to my self
i hate like 3 or 4 ppl in the chat room cause of this and they didnt even do anything bad i hate it i just wanna be ok with it cause i dont wanna get angry one day and do something really bad
any bad spelling i dont care ok
   
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Re: i get so angry then sad - February 27th 2012, 11:48 AM

Hey there, I'm going to move this to Mental Health.

And I can sort of relate to feeling angry. For me, it never happens gradually. One minute I'm fine, then I suddenly blow up at the smallest thing. It takes me a long time to calm down, but then I feel sad. Usually I'm sad due to guilt for blowing up, perhaps that is the same with you?

If this is the case, try to remind yourself when you are angry, that it's not rational to be so upset. This sometimes help calm me down a little. Also, with my boyfriend and mother, I let them know afterwards, "Hey, I'm sorry. I don't know why I got so angry. It's nothing personal. I'm just edgy for some reason."

Then this helps me feel less guilty, as they realize I'm not just sulking around, but had a random outburst instead.

Hope this helps a bit.

And don't worry about spelling Your post was still quite readable!
   
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Re: i get so angry then sad - February 27th 2012, 02:38 PM

Hey again, I can kind of relate to this because I have some pretty major mood swings like I'm perfectly fine and then one little thing happens that tips me off and I get angry. Then after a while I feel so bad about getting angry that I'm sad and upset with myself. I agree with Kelly that telling yourself it is irrational to be upset can sometimes help calm you down. Also for me having someone to talk to about it and sort out why I got angry can help.
   
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Re: i get so angry then sad - February 27th 2012, 05:43 PM

The recognition that you are feeling irrationally angry is a bit step. Mood swings are normal for everyone, and you certainly aren't alone there. It does sound as if you feel guilty for your outbursts afterwards, but self injury isn't the best way to help yourself. Apologizing may help with the guilt, and acknowledging your anger may help you to discover some common patterns that trigger it. Perhaps writing down each instance will help you to see the pattern, and you can develop some strategies to avoid / cope with them. As well, if you feel that this is something that is taking over your life, then talking to your doctor about it may not be a bad idea.

Take care.


"To see a world in a grain of sand,
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour."
William Blake - Auguries of Innocence
   
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Re: i get so angry then sad - February 28th 2012, 08:00 AM

when ever i get really angry i feel like my whole body is telling me to hurt my self i dont want to say what i do it might be triggering
   
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Re: i get so angry then sad - February 28th 2012, 12:37 PM

Hi J,

if you are making people around you go away, you should talk to them, to your family and close friends about this. Just let them know that you get angry and then you can't control it and you lose it, they'll probably understand and won't freak out that much everytime you have a bad reaction.

Then, when this happens to you, try to relativize things and don't see things just as black or white because there is always someting in between. Try to be rational, talk to yourself and think of what happened to get so angry, what was the real situation and how have you interpreted that situation to get mad. Probably you'll start to realize you're interpreting things the wrong way and you have to learn to deal with stuff using other tools, and not just anger and frustration. It is hard to "unlearn" this and learn a better way to cope with things but it is possible and necessary...
   
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Re: i get so angry then sad - February 28th 2012, 12:43 PM

if anyone here could look at this aswell it would be cool
http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f12-s...but-self-harm/
   
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Re: i get so angry then sad - February 28th 2012, 09:11 PM

The fact you feel sad after being angry and doing whatever counterproductive activity seems similar to regret, remorse or empathy. Instead of expressing it outward to those particular people, you turn it inward on yourself. Why you do that instead of expressing it outward is the million dollar question. I've been in several physical fights and plenty of verbal battles, some I initiated but I never felt sad, remorseful, regretful or any of that afterward. When you're angry, instead of hurting yourself, find a punching bag (i.e. not a human punching bag) and go at it, let all the anger out, doesn't matter how long it takes. Since you have a strong sense of guilt, remorse or whatever you want to call it, apologize to the person regardless of your previous relationship with them and that you shouldn't have let your anger fly off the handle.


I can rip you off, and steal all your cash, suckerpunch you in the face, stand back and laugh. Leave you stranded as fast as a heart-attack.
- Danko Jones (I Think Bad Thoughts)
   
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Re: i get so angry then sad - February 29th 2012, 08:43 PM

We have several ways of handling our emotions: talking to someone, punching people, crying your heart out, having sex with random people, stealing stuff, hurting yourself, vomiting your guts out... Some of these ways are wrong, not just by themselves, but because they are useful maybe at the beginning, but not after a while. You may notice that for instance cuting your arm or whatever may ease your emotional pain temporarily, but then you realise you're fucked up anyway and that's why we need to learn a correct and effective way to face things...

One big step is start talking to people, you need to identify your feelings and let them out, apologize, tell people how you feel about this or that, things that you would like to change, I don't know. All those emotions, when kept inside for a long time and many of them together, become unbearable and they have to get out... It's not easy, but you need to express your feelings in a non harmful way...
   
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