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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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MadPoet Offline
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Name: Amanda.
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I can't stand how I look. - January 11th 2009, 08:33 PM

Basically, I hate my weight.
I've been overweight for practically my whole life.
There was a period of time where I lost a bunch of weight by being on a healthy diet, but I gained it all back. And then I lost it again, and I've kept it that way for about a year. But now I'm started to get nervous it's gonna be an endless cycle of losing then gaining. Because I can't stop eating. When I'm bored, I eat. When I feel fat, I eat. When I'm feeling anything I don't want to feel, I eat. I don't know why. Everyone tells me I don't look overweight, but the scale says I am. And I hate how I look, in everything. I don't know what to do anymore about it. I wanna lose weight, but I can't stop eating, and I can't even stay at a same weight for a period of time.

I guess I just get really sick of eating, yet I can't stop. It's so humiliating to admit this too...






A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts


   
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Re: I can't stand how I look. - January 11th 2009, 09:14 PM

Hey Amanda. Don't be humiliated ok? No one thinks any different of you for admitting this. It's something hard to admit, no doubt. I understand that you might hate your weight. But, weight isn't the most important thing. Health it. You shouldn't base your feelings upon your weight because you have a range of weights that are healthy for you. If you're really that certain it isn't healthy for you, possibly, talk to your doctor about a healthy eating and diet plan. Wait, don't call it a plan, call it a life style. I know, eating healthy cold turkey can be hard. Which is why, you need to remember to treat yourself too. Every so often, it's ok to have a little junk food. It's ok to have some chocolate or something. You don't need to cut out everything you like. Also, I found writing my food schedule down for the day, helped a lot. This way you have something in front of you to keep you on track. Try and remember how great it feels to be down at that healthy weight ok? Once you start, it feels good. Remember what it's like. I know food is sometimes a safety net for everything, but, when you feel like over eating, try and keep your mind busy. Put on some music that gives your energy or try getting outside. Try to do things that keep you and your mind very busy, so you don't need to think about eating. If you need to talk about anything else, let me know ok? Take care. I'll be more then happy to talk anytime.

~Stay strong and have faith~


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Baby stand tall. You can have it all.

Don't you worry your pretty little mind, people throw rocks at things that shine..
   
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Re: I can't stand how I look. - January 12th 2009, 11:24 AM

Dear Amanda,
I know exactly what you're going through. Ive been overweight most of the time during my life(heck, i am now) and I have been suffering for an eating disorder for five years. I pretty much understand about how you feel, hating your body, hating the reflection staring back at you. I got the idea. I feel it everyday. But remember this, you are not alone. No matter what your head said..you are beautiful no matter who you are. Because beauty comes from the inside.

take care okay, pm if you need to talk.
xxx


"The one you really are
But you don't have to hide your heart
You're a miracle in every way
Sometimes it might seem hard
your whole world falls apart
Just know that when you hear the rain

Even heaven cries
Everybody cries
It's ok to doubt
Yourself sometimes
You don't have to be afraid
Of what you fear inside
It's alright, it's alright
Cause even heaven cries"
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Re: I can't stand how I look. - January 12th 2009, 02:06 PM

Hi Amanda,

Comfort eating is actually quite common. I've never been in that position, but I do comfort eat alot. The only thing i can really suggest is to try and find something to take the place of food. Perhaps when your feeling low go out with friends, or do some exercise...or change the food you eat. Have fruit and steamed veg, or similar, rather than unhealthier foods.

If it comes to it, speak to a doctor, they may be able to advice something else.

xxx


   
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Re: I can't stand how I look. - January 13th 2009, 02:56 PM

Heyy

Honestly, I could have written what you wrote. I can totally understand how you feel about it being something you're ashamed of - I'd love to open up to my counsellor about it, but I'm too embarrassed and worried about what she'll think of me (I'm also overweight) But a friend of mine suffered from the same thing, and she did manage to seek help - and now she's on the road to recovery. No one thought she was disgusting or weak.

But I understand how hard it is, and where you're coming from. I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone. PM me if you EVER want to talk about it
   
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