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Trying on clothes... - April 19th 2013, 06:23 AM

This is like my biggest trigger. I haven't starved since January 2013 and haven't purged since June 2012, but no matter what, trying on clothes brings back those thoughts and I even break down crying more often than not. I'm in a play next week and we got our outfits this week to try on and yesterday I tried on my party dress for the scene, not only was it ugly, it wouldn't fit. I only half told the truth and said it wouldn't go over my boobs, which was true, but it also would never have buttoned over my stomach. She found another dress somehow and today I had to try it on, it fit alright, because it's one solid size all the way around, no waist line, no bust line, just a giant rectangle, it looks like a night gown or worse a sheet with arms sewn on. And I know it's only because of my weight. All of the others girls get pretty dresses and even though mine is supposed to be more plain than there's, it's only THAT ugly because of my weight.


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Re: Trying on clothes... - April 19th 2013, 08:24 PM

Okay, first of all I know exactly what you mean about trying on clothes, I have to actively work to avoid developing an eating disorder and after trying on (mostly jeans) I get upset too, but I try to remember that clothes were not made for me, they were just made and sometimes I get lucky enough to find something that fits me and it's not my fault if stuff doesn't. I'm not going to spiral into hating myself and my body because a certain company doesn't make clothes in my size.

This is a bit different because it sounds like someone made this costume to fit you and it still doesn't fit right, that isn't necessarily proof that it's "ugly" because of your weight. If you've battled eating disorder behaviors it's easy to make that jump, but just because you think that doesn't mean it's true.


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Re: Trying on clothes... - April 30th 2013, 06:37 PM

Cheye, you're lovely. I'm so sorry you had this incident. I've had similar moments, especially for my height. All clothes for people at 5'0 are made to be really tiny and I'm...not. I have large hips, large breasts, a large butt and so...I have to get clothes made for girls a lot taller and just get them hemmed. It's really embarassing to try on stuff in the store since it's always dragging. But it's okay, we're just cooler than average people. Clothes cannot contain our awesomeness.

When it comes to trying on clothes in stores, I'd recommend going to particular stores. Some stores are much more suited for bustier, curvier and awesomer people. I have a good time at Goodwill, since the sizes are very often not on the clothes and they're just kinda organized by size. There are also plus-size sections, which allow for cute clothes for all sizes, and not just ugly clothes for the curvy awesome people.

Next time, for a play, I'd also suggest you ask to make your own clothes or have a friend help you! My mom would always help me make my costumes when I acted. I hope this helps, good luck! <3


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