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L3@h Offline
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Name: Leah
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Unhappy Bones - May 21st 2013, 02:00 PM

ok, so i thought it was all in my mind. that i wasn't eating because i wanted something in my life that i could control, among other things. There was like a switch in my head that made me realise i could still be in control, even if i just ate in portions. I've been ok for like two days. but now my collar bones are covering up, you can't see my ribs as much, and i can feel my thighs touching again, my hip bones are disappearing, i even hate the sight of my back as well as my front, i can see my face changing shape, i hate the feeling of my stomach when i sit down. this may sound weird, but i love my bones, they make me feel better if i see them.
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Kindred Offline
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Re: Bones - May 22nd 2013, 07:35 PM

Morning Leah

You know what your body is doing? It's filling up with life. It is literally coming back to life because it has quite literally been dying. I'm very, very proud of you, I seriously am. Suddenly the eating disorder forum is filled with people with good news and me likes this. You're part of it. I can't really give this post the attention it deserves because I'm exhausted, but I just wanna say it gets better. Just stick with it, yeah?

Take as long as you need.
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Re: Bones - May 23rd 2013, 05:32 AM

Hey Leah,

Have you tried seeing somebody professional? I know that it is hard, but there are people that can help you deal with these feelings. As our cutie Owlie said, what is happening is natural, healthy, and necessary for your body. But the feelings? They suck. Recovery is a wonderful process, but sometimes, it absolutely sucks.

Professional help can help you deal with the day-to-day sucky feelings that often lead you to the eating disorder in the first place. It doesn't have to mean inpatient care, which people often believe; it can mean occasional therapy, a one time consultation with somebody that can give you advice, ongoing outpatient care, etc.

Reach out, you deserve it!

I said to the sun, "Tell me about the big bang"
& the sun said “it hurts to become."
Andrea Gibson, "I Sing The Body Electric; Especially When My Power Is Out"
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