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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
pixiesticks Offline
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Slightly confused...? - January 12th 2009, 09:10 PM

Everyone I've talked to says I don't have an ED.

But, I don't eat breakfast, rarely lunch. Then I eat dinner (probably not a complete meal) and have a snack. That's all I usually eat in a day. I feel horrible after eating it, I hate my body. Sometimes I don't eat because I'm just not hungry, or because I like the hunger feeling. Other times it's just because I don't want to gain more weight. I eat less calories a day then I should. I'm not underweight or anything, I'm overweight. But then, sometimes I'll eat and eat and eat, and eat more then I should in a day, then it'll be a few days without eating because I'll feel so bad about eating a lot.

I know you can't diagnose me or anything, but does this sound like an ED at all? Or is it just bad eating habits?

I feel like a freak for posting this =/

Last edited by pixiesticks; January 15th 2009 at 03:36 PM.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Slightly confused...? - January 12th 2009, 09:36 PM

Dear Aleisha,
I can't diagnosed you, as I'm hot a doctor. But it does sound like eating disorder to me. Have you ever heard of Ed-nos? You sound like me. I'm overweight too and been suffering for bulimic for the past five years. I did exact same thing. Your not alone.
take care okay?
xxx


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Slightly confused...? - January 12th 2009, 09:41 PM

Hey Aleisha. Don't feel like a freak for posting this. TH is made to be an atmosphere in which you don't need to worry about posting because no one will judge you. As for your question, personally, I'd say it sounds borderline to me. You DO eat, but not enough. You over eat sometimes. It isn't healthy, eating disorder or no eating disorder. It sounds to me like it could develop into one. Again, I'm not a doctor but I think you should talk to one. The constant change back and forth is no healthy way to live and won't help you lose any weight, if needed. If you visit the doctor, he/she can let you know if you are over weight and give you a healthy plan to follow. It always helps to hear it from a doctor. Once you see a change, you'll start to get a lot of motivation. Remember that if you keep eating nothing and then a lot, you'll more then likely gain weight because your body will hang on to all those calories it was being deprived of earlier. I hope this helped a little bit. Message me if you need anything at all. Take care.

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Re: Slightly confused...? - January 13th 2009, 04:26 AM

Heya Aleisha, as other people have already mentioned, none of us on here have a medical degree so we can't diagnose you with anything. However from what you've written this sounds like it could develop into something very very serious if you let it. I can't diagnose you but even if this isn't an eating disoder yet, you definitely appear to have disordered eating and this could develop into something far worse.
You've mentioned that you've been skipping meals during some days but then on other days that you eat far more than normal. I can relate to what you've written, this is very common for somebody suffering from an eating disorder/ disordered eating. You end up getting so hungry that you lose control and then start eating and eating and can't stop. Then afterwards you feel very negative about what you've just done. This is obviously not a healthy thing to be doing because during the times when your body is not getting enough calories and energy it will go into something very like, 'starvation mode' for want of a better expression. Then when you start eating again it will take in and store all the energy you've consumed in case it happens again. I hope this makes some sense. In other words, I don't want to frighten you but this could cause some weight gain.
Is there anyway you could perhaps get yourself a doctors appointment about this? If you really want to lose a little bet of weight then I really think it would be beneficial for you to see a professional dietitan and get a proper diet and exercise program with a healthy balanced diet. This will be far more successful than skipping meals and not eating. Having something professional to follow, like a dietitian program will probably be easier to follow than something unprofessional. I hope that this helps a bit, please take care and feel free to pm me at any time. xxx lisa


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Re: Slightly confused...? - January 13th 2009, 08:44 AM

Hey Aleisha,

YOU'RE NOT ALONE. This is what I'm doing now (and I'm a tad overweight myself), but I had bulimia for a couple of years, and I know I'm not a doctor, but this sounds like it could develop into an ED fairly quickly. You need to get somebody to help you overcome this. You're NOT a freak for posting this- that's why we're here! All we want to do is help you, and you should want to help you too If you ever need me, I'm here!

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Re: Slightly confused...? - January 13th 2009, 05:41 PM

Thanks everyone =]

I know I should tell someone and get help for this...but I'm scared and humiliated. I don't even know why =/ I know this will probably turn into an ED if I don't tell anyone, but in the back of my mind, I like that idea because I know I'll get skinny if I just stop eating. [i'm scared by the fact that i like it]

I've read everything about how bad it is to starve yourself and what can happen if you do, but I can't even use that to start eating a normal amount of food. It's like...I don't even care.

[i've even wanted to purge after eating a lot..but i'm scared what will happen if i do]

-sigh- I'm never going to get enough courage to go to someone with this.
   
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Re: Slightly confused...? - January 13th 2009, 11:49 PM

I know how you feel... I do exactly the same thing D=
I like what I'm doing and I hate that I like it... It's so weird... one half of my mind says this is a bad thing to be doing, and the other half tells me it's great and I'm gunna lose lots of weight and be really happy.
I've read heaps of stuff on what happens when people do this to themselves... but it never seems to change my way of thinking about it... sometimes it makes me worse... gives me ideas about how I could... um... do it better... I dunno how else to put it.
I've thought about purging before... In fact I'm thinking about it now... but I never do because I'm scared I'll get caught.

I ate so much today and I feel horrible D=
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Re: Slightly confused...? - January 14th 2009, 03:34 PM

Please at least consider telling someone about this Aleisha before it gets out of control. I can't emphasise enough how horrible it is having an eating disorder. It rules your life and you will never ever be completely free of it. I know how you feel about putting on weight, howver do you really really want it so much that you are willing to give up every postive thought that you ever have about yourself? The horrible but true facts about an ED is that it will begin to rule you. Please don't purge, it becomes a habit which you can't escape from. Something that doesn't just happen once or every now and again but every time that you eat. It's not nice and is very very dangerous. OK, I'm sorry if this post is a little intense. Please don't consider doing this to yourself, i'm not trying to scare you by writing this. Ali, if you read this, please don't do this either. Please get yourself a doctors appointment about this, a professional could help you loose weight in a healthy way with a balanced diet and exercise. Take care and pm me any time. xxx lisa


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  (#9 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Slightly confused...? - January 15th 2009, 01:31 PM

Asking for help is scary and it takes a lot of courage, but I know you can do it. Getting help now will make things easier, most likely, as you're still afraid of what could happen. I know how easy it is to fall in love with the idea of an eating disorder, but you have to remember all of the negative things it does to your health, both physical and mental.

If you're finding this hard to speak about, face-to-face, maybe you can write someone a note about what's going on in your head and how you're feeling. You could give the note to a school counselor, a parent, your favorite teacher, or even a nurse or doctor. Not a single one of these people will judge you for asking for help, I promise.

Let me know if you need to talk. I'm always available. :]



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Re: Slightly confused...? - January 17th 2009, 11:47 AM

Hey girly. I would say that you do have an ED. I can't diagnose you but you should probably talk to a school nurse or a doctor or someone like that. They will help you. I know it's hard to try to see the good things about yourself but if you try to push the bad things out little by little that should help. I can tell you that one good thing about yourself is that you are amazingly strong for being able to post this. And the fact that you are worried that you have an ED means you care about yourself a little bit. If you ever need help I'm here for you darling.

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Re: Slightly confused...? - January 17th 2009, 08:35 PM

I don't even know if I want help. Is that a bad thing?

Ugh. I ate hardly anything Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. And I lost weight. Then I ate two [small] meals Friday. And gained. And I almost broke down crying when I saw I weighed more then before.

I'm losing it. I'm really really losing it. Somethings bad is going to happen if I don't tell someone. I just don't know how to...or if I want to.

I feel like a bad person for [maybe] not wanting help =/ Why wouldn't I want help if I know what I'm doing is bad for me? If I know that it will screw my life up even more?


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