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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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Re-referral again - April 19th 2015, 06:35 PM

I have my first appointment with a psychologist tomorrow. I got referred in October and it's taken this long to get to the top of the waiting list -_-
Given my history you'd think people would take things more seriously but nope.. Anyhow I'm really quite nervous about tomorrow, from years of disordered eating, seeing so many different people it still doesn't make it any easier. When I got referred I wanted to tackle recovery head on - but now I don't. As im sure many of you guys know, it's always a whirlwind in the mind. I'm actually scared, im scared of being judged, scared of getting help and of not getting help. what 'help' entails I don't quite know, i'm nervous and shaky im anxious.. And the worst bit is ive fucking gained weight since October, if the psych had seen me then I would have got diagnosed 'anorexic' but now Im 'just' underweight. Why is it that they all go by figures and numbers when it doesn't matter whether your BMI is editor edit it's an eating disorder either way.. it makes the whole ordeal ten times worse.. My week is just going to be so busy. Tomorrow I see the eating disorders team, Tuesday I see my therapist for EMDR, Wednesday I see my doc and have a blood test, and Thursday I see a different one of my therapists for a review/follow up appointment. And all the while I will be on placement Tuesday - Friday. It's so nerve-wracking I feel like im gonna collapse from the shakes and palpitations.. I hope I make it through...or I could just give up now couldn't I. Fucks sake I hate this shit


''No pressure, no diamonds''

There may not always be a direct answer to a problem, but there is always a way to get through it.
Strength is the best quality of the human mind and body, and I believe everyone has it; whether they believe it or not. Look for that tiny glimmer of hope deep inside yourself and once you've found it let it blossom, glow and illuminate your life.

I'm always here if anyone wants to talk.


x x x

Last edited by Hypothesis.; April 19th 2015 at 06:40 PM. Reason: Please don't include BMIs. :)
   
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Re: Re-referral again - April 19th 2015, 06:41 PM

I know you can do this! I don't know why they just use numbers and figures either, but be as honest with them as possible about how you are feeling and I bet they will be able to offer you at least some form of help.


   
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Re: Re-referral again - April 19th 2015, 06:47 PM

Hey. Hang in there okay you can get through this. Yes therapy is scary at first but it will get easier to talk about things. They aren't their to judge you but to help you get better and become healthy my pm box is always open




Life is too

Short to spend

It at war with

Yourself.

Iím catching stars in the sky because I am fixing the soul within me. May it be from the heart a girl broke years ago or my soul simply repairing itself as it was shattered on my walk on this earth. May the stardust fill those cracks within my soul making me brand new, but never forgetting who I once was.


   
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Re: Re-referral again - April 20th 2015, 12:37 PM

Well just got back from my appointment. It was very long and god damn it was difficult. The psychologist knew more about me in one sitting than I knew about myself. But I can say one thing though, she is very very good at what she does. She was very intuitive and could pinpoint things about what I was saying to something else, and was quite challenging. She worked very well with me; and was quite supportive. We didn't go into details about much to be honest, but she got a very good understanding of me from what we did speak about. She wants to refer me to the dietician as she feels that will be beneficial for me, but wants me to work with a psychologist at the same time.. But before she does all that she wants to see me again a couple more times to gain a better understanding of me as a person and learn more about some of the issues I have got and experiences I have been through.. It's left me feeling wholly overwhelmed and nervous about everything though.. My minds buzzing


''No pressure, no diamonds''

There may not always be a direct answer to a problem, but there is always a way to get through it.
Strength is the best quality of the human mind and body, and I believe everyone has it; whether they believe it or not. Look for that tiny glimmer of hope deep inside yourself and once you've found it let it blossom, glow and illuminate your life.

I'm always here if anyone wants to talk.


x x x
   
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Re: Re-referral again - April 21st 2015, 03:32 AM

Well I'm glad it worked out for you and hope you get the help you need and deserve




Life is too

Short to spend

It at war with

Yourself.

Iím catching stars in the sky because I am fixing the soul within me. May it be from the heart a girl broke years ago or my soul simply repairing itself as it was shattered on my walk on this earth. May the stardust fill those cracks within my soul making me brand new, but never forgetting who I once was.


   
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