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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Name: Stephanie
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Location: Greenwood, Indiana

Posts: 465
Join Date: January 7th 2009

treatment... mixed emotions - January 13th 2009, 04:35 PM

I think I'm finally going to treatment!!! I've been struggling with my ED for two years now... and my dreams are finally comming true! I talked to my counsilor today about my ED and she said that she's going to help me find funding to go to REMUDA RANCH! I am so ready to recover...

but I'm also really scared... they are going to control everything.
what I eat.
when I exercize.
I can't purge.
No laxatives...
and no control over what I'm going to weigh...
I'm probably going to freak when I get there.
But with them taking control of my eating habits I understand that I'll have more energy to figure out what is really wrong with me, why I do this.
I'm excited and scared at the same time.
The feeling is really strange.

Like a diet of the mind, I just choose not to indulge certain appetites; like my appetite for patterns; perhaps my appetite to imagine and to dream. - A Beautiful Mind

I met Steven October 3rd, 2008. We've been practically inseperable ever since. ♥
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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
love__me Offline
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Re: treatment... mixed emotions - January 13th 2009, 06:33 PM

Stephanie, I'm proud of you for reaching out to your counselor. I am very proud of you for looking at this in a positive way, most people that are going into treatment, don't look at it like you do. I understand that you are scared, i believe that is normal. Could go to the Cheris center, since you live in Greenwood, Indiana? It's in Indianapolis, Indiana, and you wouldn't have to be in IP or anything. I know, because i was considering going there myself.

PS. I'm going to add you onto AIM, if that's okay.

You are beautiful just the way you are.
Looking like a fallen star.
Don't listen to what people say.
They don't know the real you, anyways.
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Jaymz404 Offline
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Re: treatment... mixed emotions - January 13th 2009, 06:37 PM

Are all those points not a good thing, if you have a ED that you cannot or find dificult to control, them monitoring your weight, making sure you have healthy balanced meals etc.

Is that not a good thing?

I think you will be all the better for it, and hopefully it will teach you to relearn some of your habbits and accept your body more, as ED's are psychological. It may help you to be more accepting of yourself.

I was suprised when you mentioned laxatives.
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: treatment... mixed emotions - January 13th 2009, 08:03 PM


I'm really proud of you for getting up the courage to tell your counselor. I'm sure it's a really scary step going to treatment, but I'm sure you'll do great! Stay strong and listen at treatment. Good luck with everything!

"You've just been B-Wildered." -Brian Wilson <3
Trumpet love; Tenderlips.

"Where there is love there is life."- Mahatma Gandhi

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jeremiah 29:11

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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
eunoia Offline
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Jeez, get a life!
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Re: treatment... mixed emotions - January 13th 2009, 11:08 PM

Stephanie, that is such a HUGE step, and you should be proud of yourself. You have taken the first steps towards recovery, and that is such a scary thing to do.

Keep strong throughout this, TeenHelp will be here for you before and after, so don't forget that you can always come to us for advice or support. Take good care of yourself, and remember that you are worth this.

Someday I will be strong enough to lift not one but both of us.
I told you to be patient
I told you to be fine
I told you to be balanced
I told you to be kind
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
Music Offline
Thoroughly medicated
I've been here a while
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Name: Richard
Age: 30
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Location: Alberta, Canada

Posts: 1,575
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Join Date: January 5th 2009

Re: treatment... mixed emotions - January 13th 2009, 11:30 PM

It's great that you're able to get help like this, it shows how strong you are and that you're really ready to recover. You've recognized that this is something that you do need help with, and you've gone out and gotten that help. This is a huge step in the right direction for you and things will only get better. It may seem scary and intimidating, but I'm sure that you'll be glad you went through with it after, we'll always be here to help you whether it's before or after you're there.
Things are getting better, and it's all thanks to you. This is the biggest kind of control you could have, control over your ED.

Member since 2005
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