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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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As friend of mine is relapsing - September 30th 2016, 04:24 PM

Hello

I Consider myself fully recovered from blumimia I have gained all my weight back and I feel fantastic but I have a friend who I met at my old eating disorder recovery group she's generally gotten to a healthy weight then her mum died and now she's stopped eating again. Originally she ate an apple for breakfast lunch an apple then something small for dinner but that's no where near enough and she was telling me how she lost tons and tons of weight and now she's getting back on track. That was a while ago now and now she's at a healthy weight like me I felt we bonded and helped each other at recovery this past week she's gone back to her old eating habits what will happen to her what generally happens when someone relapses? Do they lose all the weight again? Is she in danger should I tell my doctor? Note we have the same counselor and doctor person but then again it's all confidential isn't it! I'm mainly just worried about what's going to happen to her and looking for other people's personal experiences my plan is to go and speak to her explain to her how sorry I am that she's lost her mum and that I'm always avaliable for her to cry and suggest we go together and see the doctor I can't go in with out her saying so as it's all confidential but if she agrees I may be able to sit with her so she's not so alone.

Sorry for any typos I'm now heading off out and I typed at an insane speed lol thanks guys!
   
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Re: As friend of mine is relapsing - October 1st 2016, 04:20 PM

Hey, there, first of all--I want to say congratulations on being recovered from your eating disorder. That is fantastic!

I totally understand wanting to help your friend out, and especially after everything you've been through with your own eating disorder. I think you should try talking to her, let her know that you're there for her, and that what she's doing is potentially harmful to her body.

Therapists have to stick to confidentiality, unless their patient or someone they know are at risk of harming themselves or other people. I think it's safe to say that this situation falls into that exception. Plus, your counselor will keep your anonymity safe, so your friend will never have to know it was you who told them.
   
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Re: As friend of mine is relapsing - October 6th 2016, 08:13 PM

Hey Justin.

Sorry your friend is going through this but I am glad you feel positive about your own recovery from bulimia.

Helping other people can be so hard. I would suggest you let your friend know you are always there to talk too and that you care about them and they can trust you and you'll do what you can to help. If you are serisouly worried about them, you could contact someone involved in their care, but they would not be able to give you any information about your friend due to confidentiality. So you can tell them your concerns but that would be it and then your friend may also know you have been in touch with these people such as the counselor.

Saying all this it is also so important that you look after yourself too. You have to be well to deal with this. If you aren't in a good place or feel low or what not, then you will be no good to no one so always put yourself first okay? Look after you.

If you need any help, remember we are here

Hope and wishes,
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Re: As friend of mine is relapsing - October 7th 2016, 05:28 PM

Honestly, I'd bring up the issue with her directly. Unless she is in danger to herself, going to her doctor disrespects her autonomy, which is something that somebody with an eating disorder values. When you bring it up, I'd use I language and say "I am worried about you because of your eating habits and recent traumas you have experienced, and want to make sure you know I am here for you." Don't accuse her of relapsing, nor make it focused on weight (as this can trigger people). But let her know that you're there for her and can be a safe person to go to. If you notice she continues to relapse and become worried about her well being, at that point, I'd reach out to your care team and/or her carer to express your concern. But let her take initiative first. Good luck!


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