I Want To...

[Lonely-Reject]

Ive always had self esteem problems, i hate the way i look. For a few months now ive been considering bulimia and anorexia, purposely. I know its really bad but i want to lose weight and nothing else is working. Ive tried to make myself sick, but i jsut gag and i wont throw up.
I dont know what to do! Help :S

[BrokenGirl]

tip: if you haven`t started - don`t. i know how hard it is and trust me it`s not something you want to get into. it won`t really raise your self esteem at all. it`s done nothing to mine and i don`t know that i`ll ever feel good enough. there are better ways to help your self esteem. feel free to PM me if you want to talk about it! hang in there!

Leora

[ComplexSimplicity]

Eating disorders are terrible. I've been trapped in the ED mindset since I was 13 and I'm 19 years old now. If you are unhappy with you weight its ok to lose weight but do it the right way by eating healthy and exercising and realize when you're doing too much. Also don't place so much of your self worth and self esteem in your appearance...especially your weight... you are so much more than that. Love yourself as you are now.

[Jen]

Hey Jodie,

I'm glad you are being honest about what you're thinking and feeling. I think that to someone who hasn't experienced a full-fledged eating disorder, the idea of eating disorders can sound glamorous--almost like a perfect diet or something. I know that when I was young, I thought anorexia would be such a good idea.

However, what I didn't realize (and what nobody realizes before they are in too deep) is that an eating disorder takes over you. You're not in control of it--it takes over you. It takes over your thoughts, your actions, your mindsets, your relationships, your feelings, your everything. Your life. And you might think, "Well, that's what I want". But it gets to the point where it's taken you over so much that the idea of getting back to health is unappealing. And that's why so many people with eating disorders end up the hospital, over and over again. They lose friendships, they lose themselves. All they care about is their illness. And sometimes we think "Oh, that won't happen to me". But it does. It always does.

I think it might be helpful for you to read some of the previous posts here from individuals who have gotten deep into an eating disorder. See what their life is like for them--it's not glamorous. They don't love their eating disorders the way they might have thought they would.

A life with an eating disorder is not a life.

I REALLY want to encourage you to reach out to someone--a parent, teacher, etc. who can refer you to a doctor and a counselor or any other professional support. It is so important to tackle this before it turns into something big and bad and ugly. And it's possible--I promise you.

Hang in there and take good care of yourself!
<3

[Lonely-Reject]

Thanks =] I did it a few times, but thats it so it should be ok since im not planning on doing it again.
Just from doing it a few times i realised what i was getting into, and your replies helped alot =]
thank yooooou