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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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Steph-O
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Name: Stephanie
Age: 28
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The ED is the imperfection - January 27th 2009, 07:09 PM

Would it be better to show the hurt in my eyes...
to reveal the nothingness that consumes me...
to take off my mask and let them see the ugliness I have made myself...
to usher out my tears...
to confess in plain sight...
to let go, and scream?

I
don't
Know.

all I know is that I'm crumbling.
but I'm afraid to let everyone see how bad I'm hurting.
If they knew, they would get me help right?
My drive for perfection takes me along the tip of insanity and back.
Why would I want to confess my imperfection?
I've now realized that my ED is my imperfection.
A sick catch 22...where I'm afraid of asking for help, and revealing the depths of my Disorder, of revealing my imperfection.


Like a diet of the mind, I just choose not to indulge certain appetites; like my appetite for patterns; perhaps my appetite to imagine and to dream. - A Beautiful Mind

I met Steven October 3rd, 2008. We've been practically inseperable ever since. ♥
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eunoia Offline
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Re: The ED is the imperfection - January 28th 2009, 06:23 PM

Stephanie,

I'm so sorry that you are struggling. It can be so, so difficult to reach out for help, to let others see we're in pain. But sometimes it's what we need.

Please consider telling someone that you are struggling. It's okay to admit to being human, it's even okay to admit defeat--sometimes it proves just how strong we really are, to reach out for help. Tell a counselor, a parent, someone. Maybe your favorite teacher, or someone else you trust. It's great you've come here for support and advice. Maybe now you can take the next step. You don't even have to tell someone in person--you can send an email, or give someone a note.

Remember that you deserve to have help and support.

Let me know if you need anything at all.



Someday I will be strong enough to lift not one but both of us.
I told you to be patient
I told you to be fine
I told you to be balanced
I told you to be kind
   
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Angel Offline
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Re: The ED is the imperfection - January 28th 2009, 07:07 PM

No one is perfect, dear. It takes a lot of courage to admit one's faults, and oftentimes it is the most difficult to do. You do realize that you need help though. Telling someone about your eating disorder is a big leap of faith. They will be able to help you through because you don't have to suffer in silence. There are so many people who do care for you. Take care.


"Years ago, I knew a boy who made all the wrong choices."

   
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