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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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Girlfriend's Eating Problems - February 25th 2010, 01:40 PM

Hi, my girlfriend is having problems with eating at the present moment.

She just won't eat, she doesn't like the way she looks and is forcing herself not to eat because of that.

I know I can't force her to eat, but I really am worried that something might happen to her, and I was wondering if there was anything I could do now to help her. I keep telling her she is beautiful and I love her the way she is but it's like she can't understand that and still won't eat.

Thanks in advance, if you have any questions feel free to ask.
   
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Re: Girlfriend's Eating Problems - February 25th 2010, 02:03 PM

Hey there,

First off I want to say you seem like an amazing guy for caring about her, she's lucky to have you in her life. When it comes to an eating disorder, sometimes, the biggest help of all can simply be knowing someone cares, and that you aren't alone. Whether or not she shows it, I do think it helps her to hear you say she's beautiful etc.. the more you hear something the more it sinks in, and the more you believe it, so don't stop what you're doing.

Try sitting down and talking with her, seriously talking about it. Try to get her to talk about it - talking about what's on your mind is an important part of recovery, and it's not healthy to bottle things up, at any rate. See if she'll tell you what she's feeling, why she's feeling this way, etc. When the both of you understand what's going on, you can work together to brainstorm other ways she can feel good about herself, without needing to restrict her eating.

If nothing is helping, or if you think she's a danger to herself, then I'd recommend you speak with her parents or a family member of her's about her eating. Sometimes that's the only way to get help, by bringing other people into the mix, having more support and such. It may feel to her like a betrayal of trust, but if you decide to go this route, just remind her you care and you're worried about her.

I hope things start to look up, take care of yourself.



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Re: Girlfriend's Eating Problems - February 26th 2010, 03:35 AM

Hey,

I agree with everything Sarah said. It's great you care so much, a little caring can go along way.

Just encourage her to eat if you can. Just like, small things like a protien/ granola bar or fruit of some sorts?

Keep reminding her how beautiful and important she is to you, it helps more than it would appear sometimes. Keep a close eye on her and if you feel she's in serious danger, it would be wise to seek out some help for her.
And like Sarah said, take care of yourself too!

~ Grace
   
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Re: Girlfriend's Eating Problems - March 3rd 2010, 04:52 AM

It is great that you are encouraging her, keep it up and like the others said try to encourage her to eat small things.

i do want to give some insight in case that does not work. i have struggled with the same problem your g/f is having for many years and it is a mindset and sometimes no matter what everyone says that mindset still is telling that person "you're not skinny enough" "don't eat that". I had people telling me i was beautiful all the time to try to get me to eat but i just wasn't hearing it.

so if it gets too serious i would suggest looking into getting her help.

if you have any questions feel free to PM me, i'm not an expert but i have fought the same struggle for many years and would be glad to help
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