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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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wanting change - April 27th 2010, 12:08 PM

i used to stop eating altogether but when my mum found out i was made to eat but now ive discovered if i go through spells of taking my anti-depressents then stop for days then take them again that i can eat what i like and ill just sick it back up and nobody notices any difference ... im tired of being so fat and all i want is to be skinny , i know its wrong but why should I not be allowed to do what I want with my body ??!!

Last edited by Jen; April 27th 2010 at 05:06 PM. Reason: Removing trigger warning.
   
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Re: wanting change - April 27th 2010, 05:13 PM

Hi there,

Your question is a good one. It must seem to you that if it's your body, why shouldn't you be allowed to restrict, get sick, mess with your meds, etc.? I think the answer is because it will damage you. If you keep going down this path, you could end up medically unstable, in the hospital, or even dead. And it sounds like your mum is intervening because she is concerned and doesn't want to see that happen. I know that can be frustrating--I always hated when my mom monitored what I was doing--but as corny as it may sound, I'm grateful now that she did so.

Have you seen a doctor? If a doctor determines that it would be healthy for your body to lose weight, then that's fine--and you can talk with him or her about the proper way to do so. But, if a doctor tells you that your weight is healthy where it is, or that you need to gain weight to be healthy, then losing isn't a good option.

I'd really encourage you to reach out to someone--your mum, a teacher, counselor, etc., and talk to them about what's going on, and start seeing a therapist/counselor if possible. Talking to people, both casually and professionally, can really make a world of difference. I promise you that you can get to a point where you don't hate your body.

Take care of yourself.
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