TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Stuckinhell Offline
Member
Senior TeenHelper
*******
 
Stuckinhell's Avatar
 
Name: Sammy
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Location: UK

Posts: 813
Join Date: January 6th 2009

Scared - August 4th 2010, 08:48 PM

I'm going home to my mums tomorow for a whole week. and i'm totally petrified. My eatings got so bad these last few weeks. I'm hardly eating a thing, and purging daily. I dont think i've lost weight, but i'm pale and shaky with dark under my eyes.

I'm so scared of going home. I cant let my mum find out, but i'm running out of excuses. I've got to do 6 nights with her. That's 18 meals. All i can see is endless arguments, worried looks, and me getting worse and worse under the stress.

And whats scarying me most, is the simple fact that i dont want to stop. I feel so in control. Each time i deny myself. Each time i purge, i know that my life is in my own hands. I feel so split. Like i'm watching myself deteriate, nothing i can do. Because deep down, i'm happy like this.

I'm scared that i'll get back to how i used to be. That i'll undo all the work i've done. And i havent a clue how i'm going to manage eating around my mum. FUCK FUCK FUCK


   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Jen Offline
Dance in the rain
I've been here a while
********
 
Jen's Avatar
 
Name: Jen
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Location: Massachusetts

Posts: 1,482
Blog Entries: 4
Join Date: March 28th 2009

Re: Scared - August 5th 2010, 12:50 AM

Maia, I know this might not be what you want to hear: but the truth is, I think it could be good for you if your mom finds out. Right now even though the disordered part of you doesn't want help, you need help. And I bet that deep down, the healthy part of you knows that. This might be an easier way to get it. You CAN get to a solid recovery point, Maia. I know you don't believe it's worth it, but once you're there, you will not miss your ED. You will not want to restrict, to purge, to lose weight. You won't need to have those desires. It just...won't be there. It's incredible. You can do this. I believe in you.

<3




"Do not ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive."

“if nothing changed, there’d be no butterflies”

  Send a message via MSN to Jen  
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
scared

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright ©1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.