"Not good enough" for a relationship?

[skydivers-in-reverse]

Has anyone ever avoided relationships because you feel too self conscious?

I went through a period of borderline normal eating and I went from underweight to a healthy weight over the summer. But I feel so self-conscious if someone gets close to me or touches me and I feel like it's triggering me back into restriction.

[~CourageousSurvivor~]

Hey Jessica,

I am sorry it took so long for me to reply to this; I actually saw this when you first posted it but I was a bit unsure how to respond. Now, I have found an answer and I hope it helps you in some way.

The answer is yes I avoid relationships because I am self conscious. I avoid communicating with guys in general because of how self conscious I am. I don't feel that I am pretty enough to ever have a guy look at me with anything but disgust. However, that is my irrational mind talking and rationally there is probably at least one guy who would want to get close to me.

I think that is why ED is so dangerous. I mean, medically speaking ED is really dangerous but mentally he is just as bad. ED has the person believing that they are not good enough and they grow dependent upon ED for a lot of stuff. Without ED people begin to believe that they would never be good enough for anything. The most important thing to do is realize that you are perfect without ED and ED will not make you feel any better. If you start restricting again it will lead to your self esteem decreasing and then you will just want to restrict more. I encourage you to fight that urge to restrict and remind yourself that you are beautiful just as you are.

Also, if you can try and let people in on your struggles. Let your friends and family help you through this. It could really prove beneficial.

Have you ever thought of writing down a list of five or more good qualities you possess? Sometimes when ED is overly strong it helps to point out some good qualities and hold on to them. If you struggle with finding good qualities let your friends and family help you identify them. Your family and friends love you for a reason so let them show you why.

I really hope this helped and if you ever want to chat please feel free to pm me.

Jenna