my bf says i have a problem

[katiebug6410]

okay so my boyfriend told me today that i'm getting back into the same routine i was in when i was anorexic; and that scares him. He was my best friend for 8 years before becoming my bf and he was the only person to realize and say anything to me last time i was struggling with anorexia. I told him I wasn't, but he says I am and that he is just worried about me. But as I sit here thinking about it I guess he kind of has a point. I make excuses for myself to not eat by saying I'm just too busy with college and work so I don't have time to eat. Its pretty much a good week if I eat even a banana every other day, and I'm always carrying a water bottle around with me that I refill at least 8 times a day. I work out every tuesday and thursday at the gym on campus for about an hour and a half. But does all of that really mean I'm slipping back into the ED again? I keep asking myself but I also keep hearing myself rationalize it in every way possible. I don't want to worry my boy friend, but I don't want to believe him that I'm slipping back into it. Sorry I know this probably doesn't seem important to anyone ...sometimes it just helps me to write things out to think about them...

[kokorocks]

I'm proud of you for writing about this on here, and you completed the first step. You recognize that it could be a possibility that you're slipping back into your eating disorder. Maybe you should talk to an adult, and try to get help. I know that's the last thing you want to hear, but that's the best thing you can do at the moment. I'm sorry I can't be of more help. Message me if you want to vent/talk anything.

[katiebug6410]

thx. the hardest thing right now is knowing that my boyfriend is worried about me and that I got upset with him and told him that I didn't have a problem. But after thinking about it I realize I may but I don't want to...and it scares me

[kokorocks]

Originally Posted by katiebug6410

thx. the hardest thing right now is knowing that my boyfriend is worried about me and that I got upset with him and told him that I didn't have a problem. But after thinking about it I realize I may but I don't want to...and it scares me

Well, maybe you could talk to your boyfriend and he could help you. All support is great. He might not be able to help you like an adult can, but again the support is always nice.

[~CourageousSurvivor~]

Hey there,

I think the first step is realizing you have a problem. It seems like you are there and that is a good thing. So, now the next step is reaching out for help. You should not have to fight this relapse on your own. The fact that you have your boyfriends support is fantastic. As scary as it might be try talking to him about your struggles and let him help you. Reach out and fight back against your ED. Let people support you.

Now, do you think it would be possible for you to seek counseling for this? I know that might be a scary step to take but a counselor could help you in this struggle. A counselor can help you figure out the reason behind your ED and slowly help you deal with those issues. It is a scary step to take but well worth it.

Do you know what triggered this relapse? It might help if you can figure out why you relapsed because then you can slowly work on finding a way to heal from it all. The more you understand the underlying reasons behind ED the closer you can get to overcoming it.

I really hope this helped and I believe that you can make it through this. And if you ever need anything please feel free to pm me.

Jenna

[katiebug6410]

thx. my boyfriend has been there for me through everything I have faced. I talked with him about it some the other day and I apologized to him for getting upset with him. We talked about it, he said he had been noticing signs for quite sometime that I was relapsing but he didn't want to say anything until he was sure I guess. But yea I tried to talk to my counselor I see about it but all my counselor did was increase my antidepressants and ignore the topic completely so I'm kinda avoiding my counselor right now because I don't like taking my antidepressants because they make me feel foggy if that makes any sense to you.

[~CourageousSurvivor~]

Hey there,

I know what you mean about medicine making you foggy. Some times medicines do that to me as well. However, I would suggest that you talk to your doctor about it so he/she can help you figure out if you need a new medicine or something.

Also, I would suggest that you try talking to your counselor about your concerns of her pushing medicine on you to deal with the issues. If she will not listen to you then it might be time to consider a new counselor. However, talk to her first because she might not realize that that is how her response to the issue came off.

I really hope that things start improving for you and if you need someone to talk to feel free to pm me.

Jenna

[katiebug6410]

I suppose I should bring it up again and tell my counselor how she made me feel; and that it is something important that needs to be discussed, and I suppose I can talk to her my medicine as well or one of my doctors about the medicine.