Is it possible...?

[BasicFacts]

Sooo... I am fairly certain that I am developing anorexia. I am getting therapy very soon (actually I'm requesting my mother to send me to one tomorrow; wish me luck!) and I suppose I just need reassurance that it's possible to NOT obsess over my weight or appearance or food or whatever. I feel like I'm stuck here and will never be able to get out of it. Honestly, sometimes I don't WANT to get out of it. I guess that's typical of anorexia? That's what my boyfriend tells me, anyway. Anyway... yes, I just feel like it will never stop. I have been so self-conscious for so long that I just DON'T see how it can possibly stop. I'm seventeen and I've felt this way since before I was nine. I know that people have recovered after longer periods of time, but what if it doesn't work or something? Or what if I ultimately decide that I don't WANT it to work? I know that my feelings about weight, food, eating, appearance, and whatnot are completely abnormal, but I'm not always sure I want to change them. I think it's gaining weight that scares me the MOST. For fairly obvious reasons, I suppose. Anyway, I'm feeling very awkward now and I think I'm rambling. Haha.
I just... I dunno. I just don't think it's possible to fix this.
Also, possible or not, what are the treatments for anorexia that is beginning to develop? It's like I have every single mental symptom and a few of the physical symptoms, so I suppose I'm asking how a therapist would go about treating the mentality of an anorexic person.

I am terribly sorry if none of that made any sense. I have been dreadfully tired lately.

[Diaminohexanoate]

Kamillia,

IT IS SO TOTALLY POSSIBLE.

I'm pretty overweight (actually very overweight), and I know it's a problem, but that doesn't stop me from "accidentally" eating way too much of a good meal. :P

Never give up hope! Good luck on trying to find a therapist -- I believe that's an extremely important part of recovery especially for eating disorders. Not being well read in psychiatry myself, though (I'm much more of a purely medical person), I can't really answer that question.

But very probably, you will shortly find out the answer yourself, firsthand! GOOD LUCK!

PS. Sleep! Sleep is a godsend.

[BasicFacts]

Thank you!
That means a lot.

[p_fine]

Kamilla
I really admire you for your bravery and for wanting to sort it out. It must have been so hard talking to your mum. I hope it went ok. It is definitely possible to recover from this. Everyone goes through blips from time to time and you are not alone. I can completely relate to everything you said and it all made sense to me. When I was really unwell, I knew I needed help and the hardest bit of it all was talking to my parents about it. You are amazing to approach your mum about it. I was terrified about putting on weight - everyone is. But you have to remember that you want to defeat the voice and thoughts and get better! I hope you find a therapist that you can talk to - it will really help you.

Good luck xxx

[BasicFacts]

Thanks.
It did go rather well, thanks. I thought it would be extremely awkward, but it actually wasn't bad at all. I worry too much.

[p_fine]

We all worry!! You are not alone there. I am glad it went well. Its always so hard talking to parents about because unless they have been there themselves, they will never understand. That is why I found it so hard with my parents.
Hope you have had a good weekend.
xx

[BasicFacts]

Thanks.
Well, my mother had clinical depression (one of the reasons I'm sure I have it now), so I knew she could relate to that. That's why I told her about the depression and nothing else. The only thing I'm scared of is that she will find out about other things, which is why I am trying to figure out how a therapist would go about "fixing" all of the other issues, to see how much my parents would have to know. I dunno. I guess that whatever happens will happen and I should stop worrying so much.