Please read and comment- need a bit of help here

[CS33]

Hey, I've only just joined TeenHelp so I'm new to this :/
I joined so I could talk to other people who share my feelings and encounter the same problems as me...

I had a huge problem with eating a bit back, I was hardly eating anything and if I did eat I would make myself sick. It got quite bad around my birthday and christmas as you can imagine, and by that time I was making myself sick after everything I ate. I lost a stone and loved seeing my ribs and hip bones show- I knew I had a problem, but I didn't CARE- because I think I was happy. When I was losing weight, and in control, I was happy.

But then, my sister found out, and my sister told my mum. Long story short, now all my family know. I was devastated, and hated what I had put my family through, and vowed I wouldn't do it again.

The thing is, I'm really scared that I'm going to go back to how I was. I'm doing my GCSE at the moment, and with my grades and homelife spiraling out of control, I want something I can control again.

Now, whenever I look at myself in the mirror, I feel pyhsically sick at my appearance, I mean, I really hate myself, which is why I'm scared. And you shouldn't really be scared of yourself, right?
Also,my mums taking me to a councillor.. And I'm not sure if this is a good idea :/ Does it help?

Anyone else in remotely the same boat?

Thank you x

[Prisencolinensinainciusol]

I haven't had any experience with eating disorders but thought I'd reply. There are plenty of people here in the eating disorders section in a similar situation, they'll probably reply to this thread, and you can contact them if they say you can or if it says that you are welcome to in their signature.

Anyway, councellors generally are useful. I however have found that it depends heavily on the councelor. I saw about eight before I told one of them anything, just thought I trusted that one more than the others. I am just saying that you should go to the councelor, because they do help. Though if you find the councelor intimidating or unsuitable in any way, seek another one out. Perhaps I am just pedantic but I believe you need some professional help with this.

[Heartlines.]

Hey there.
Eating disorders are hard to go through. I know you know this. It is natural to feel some sort of happiness with this. But you have to decide, when is it the end? You get so happy because you look great, but eating disorders is just a subsitute for your feelings. As is self harm. These are used as coping mechanisms, and unhealthy ones, thus they will spiral out of control. It becomes an addiction.

If you don't get better for youself, get better for your family. But, ultimately, it will work best if you do this for you. You are the one who is affected the most. you deserve a healthy, happy lifestyle. I think it is great your mom is taking you to a counselor. They can really help your recover. They can help keep you on track as far as eating and not purging goes. They can help come up with a plan that works for you.

Also, another thing that you might consider. A nutritionist can help you come up with a food plan that work for you. That is also healthy for your body, and mind, They will make a plan based on what you are feeling, and what is healthy.

I think it is great that you are realizing how bad this is for you. Hold onto that as motivation. I know you can do it. <3

[distance]

Hey there,

It's sad how anorexia lies, isn't it? You think you're doing everything right but in reality its only a downward spiral. You're hurting yourself through starvation! I know you don't see it (believe me, I'm in A VERY similiar situation right now, unfortunately, and I can't truly see it in myself ATM) but its there.

It's good that you get to see a counselor!! Just remember not every counselor is for everyone so if your first one's not right find another.

The worst part IS the devistation, isn't it? I know when my "friends" (who left me) and family found out about mine I was pretty devastated and ashamed, even though there was no reason for me to be! More recently with my relapse, a few others have found out about my past and its been hard for me to handle that.

PM if you ever want to chat!!