You're not doctors but...

[MeggieMoo1995]

I think I'm anorexic.
A little more than a year ago, I was at a really low point in my life. I was really depressed and sad and lonely, and overall just sick of life. I didn't have any energy for anything. Not even eating. So I just stopped.

I liked the way it felt, being hungry. I've always had a bit of an obsession with numbers, and when I saw the ones on the scale go down, I was thrilled. And I guess I was addicted pretty quickly after that.

In the summer I started counting calories. I had my last period at the beginning of october, and I thought that was it, but it came back last week. Ugh. And I don't know. I'm always cold (that might be from spending too much time at the rink though) and i'm always tired. I have dizzy spells sometimes too.
And well to be honest, I really don't know anymore. I don't know if it matters, or if I even care. I guess I just wanted to get that off my chest.

[Heartlines.]

Hey there Megan,
Of course it matters. It's your health, and your feelings.

It's normal to feel like that whilst growing up. Sometime we, as humans, don't know how to cope so we do it in a negative way. I am not going to tell you that your body needs food, or how many meals should be eaten a day. You already know this, i am sure.

Is there anyone you can talk to, so you can recover. Recovery is hard, but so so worth it in the end. Anorexia isn't something to mess around with. You start out in control, and everything is fabulous, but it can't spiral out of control so quickly.

It's good that you vented to us. here is the perfect place1 I went through an ED, so if you need anything I am here. Take care of yourself, and your body.
<3

[MeggieMoo1995]

Thanks for answering. I really wasn't expecting anyone to.

There's only two people who know, and they're my two best friends. One is my age, and one is 25. I'm going to see a psychologist every two weeks for some other issues, but she doesn't know. And I don't really want to tell her because she'll want me to recover and I'm not ready yet.

I know it's not the right thing to be doing, and that there are better ways to live... But even if I could stop, I don't think I would.