this is harder then i thought

[jay07]

THis is so hard! I have been eating ever since i told my mom that i haven't been eating anything but dinner for 2 weeks and that i been feeling bad about myself with eating for about almost three months.

I try to eat and do..not as much as everyone but i do! but i still am constantly counting calories and weighing myself.

If my mom tells me to eat more..bc she knows i have food issues..i just tell her no i ate to much a already..when it was just a little cinn-a-bon that i had for breakfast. I was planning on having watermelon after that to feel better about having the fatty food. I haven't purged since saturday and only tried too a couple times on tuesday..it failed tho. ANWAYS

she still said it wasn't enough. So she made me have an egg on bread.

And two days ago my teacher was like "go sign up for the drama, and while you're there, eat something."
My mom said i look really pale too. My brother said "omg ur wrist are so tiny"
but this al hurts my feelings because i am really trying hard and can't get anywhere.

It just is hard because i feel like i eat so much...but that apparently isn't enough.

Yesterday for lunch i had half a mini bagel and grapes because i had chinese food the night before and knew that was not healthy. My mom got mad at me for that because she thinks I'm not trying. but i am. really am..its just not that easy, and i keep telling her that. I know i am underweight but like gah. I'm going to therapist on monday too so I'm hoping that will help.

[Heartlines.]

I'm going to close this thread as you have two other active threads in the Eating Disorder forum.

If anyone disagrees, I'd be more than willing to discuss it. :]